What Happens In Vegas... Page #3

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I complain, and you tell me

there's nothing you can do,

but we both know that's a big, fat lie,

so why don't you just

save us both the trouble

and type in those special codes

that you know

you're gonna type in eventually

and find me two rooms that are so nice

that it turns my night right back around?

She's awfully hostile for a girl named Joy.

I'm going to do exactly

what you're telling me to do, because

I'm a little frightened of you.

These are penthouse suites.

You can't get any higher than that

without going on the roof,

and you're not allowed on the roof,

because people jump.

Penthouse suites.

- Nice!

- No!

- Yeah.

- That's not bad.

Well, you're welcome.

Now watch and learn.

- Hey, buddy.

- Oh, hi. How are you?

I think you just met my friend back there.

Kind of a scary person.

Oh, Egyptian cotton. That's nice.

I want to apologize for her.

For three weeks out of the month,

we get to enjoy

God's most precious creation,

and on week four, the bill arrives.

I know what you mean.

Look, I don't want to push here,

but I know that a man in your position

is capable of producing certain amenities.

Planet Hollywood. Yeah.

VIP!

Hey. So, you're from New York,

we're from New York.

- We're going to Le Cirque, please!

- Come on.

Look, I didn't bring my buddy

all the way out to Vegas

so he could get his ass kicked. Right?

So the least you could do is help me

show him a good time.

Your buddy wouldn't know a good time

if it sat on his face.

Okay, you know what, Stripper?

You are kind of a disgusting skank.

Driver, we'll get out here! Thank you!

- Okay, bye!

- Thank you.

- Use a condom, boys.

- Bye-bye. Bye. Just go!

Oh, come on. One drink.

I'm a pretty fun guy. You can ask around.

Thanks, but we have dinner reservations.

And we have to map out our assault

on the strip.

You have a plan to make plans?

Excuse me?

I bet you look really good

with your hair down.

- My hair is down.

- One drink!

I dare you!

Did I invent hip-hop? No. But I was there.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

- So, Joy.

- Yeah?

What brings you to Sin City?

You know, just being spontaneous,

cutting loose, like everyone else.

How about yourself?

Yeah. Me? Oh, I'm here on business.

Big business, actually. I'm...

I'm a pretty important guy

in my field.

Really?

No.

Actually,

I just got fired. So, cheers to that.

I just got dumped, so, salud.

Did I mention that I got fired

by my boss-slash-father?

Did I mention that I threw

a surprise birthday party for my fianc

and the surprise was that he dumped me

in front of all of our closest friends

while they hid in the closet?

Wow. Okay, you win.

Excuse me.

We're gonna need a whole bottle.

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