Trainwreck Page #5

inside of his heart looks like. Be

nice.

AMY:

Can you just be real for a second,

if you met that dude at a CVS,

you’d have a real problem with him.

KIM:

Can you just pretend to like him?

AMY:

I am pretending. Ooh I like Tom’s

sweater. He’s doing the To Catch a

Predator look.

KIM:

Amy!

Tom approaches.

TOM:

Amy what’s up?

AMY:

Hey.

16.

TOM:

So good to see you.

AMY:

You too, looking sharp.

TOM:

I just read your article about howto talk your girlfriend into athree way.

AMY:

You read that one?

TOM:

Yeah.

AMY:

Wow.

TOM:

(To Kim)

Would you do that?

KIM:

No.

AMY:

That got off the table quick. Lethim do what he wants. You guysshould make a sex tape.

TOM:

I would.

KIM:

Noo..

TOM:

I did high school theater. I thinkI’d be pretty good at it.

INT. DAD’S LIVING ROOM - DAY

Amy is looking at a brochure for the home.

AMY:

This nursing home is nice.

KIM:

It’s too nice and it’s too

expensive. We should have put himin a shithole.

17.

AMY:

We did. This is a shithole, it’s

just the nicest shithole. Places

where the nurses don’t f*** the

patients are expensive. That’s whatyou’re paying for. Not the foodsister.

They go through boxes and throw some stuff in the trash. Kimpulls something out of a box.

KIM:

Eww. Condoms ribbed for HIS

pleasure?

AMY:

Eww. I better hold onto these.

KIM:

Is this coke?

AMY:

No. Dad didn’t love coke, he was

just a full blown alcoholic.

(sniffs it) No, must just be from a

Halloween costume.

Kim throws out Gordon’s things.

AMY (CONT’D)

Whoa whoa whoa, let’s just..

KIM:

Moving on. Don't touch it.

AMY:

These are his memories.

KIM:

No, don’t do that. We have so much

stuff to go through.

AMY:

What, he needs his wallet.

Kim rolls open a Mets poster.

KIM:

Aw.

AMY:

He loves that poster.

18.

KIM:

I know.

Kim rips a poster slowly while smiling at Amy. Amy tries tograb it but Kim dodges and taunts her.

AMY:

Kimberly. Stop it. Come on. Stopit. Not cool girl.

KIM:

That felt good.

Kim throws away a snow globe.

AMY:

No don’t throw away his snowglobes.

These are his memories. He got oneeverywhere he went.

KIM:

Did he get one from every one ofour teachers because I don’t see

them.

AMY:

He didn’t f*** all of our teachers.

KIM:

He f***ed all of my teachers.

AMY:

No he never f***ed Mr. Hecht. I

did. I’m just kidding. No hewouldn’t, but..

Kim is looking through pictures. Kim finds a photo of their

mom.

KIM:

Aw. Look at this. Mom was so

fuckable then.

AMY:

She had the best tits. When she

would lay down, they would juststay put. Mine are just like, seeya. My tities are like peace.

KIM:

Dad was such a dick.

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