Lloyd the Conqueror Page #4

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By the discount carpet store.

The entry fee is $50.

(QUIETLY) $50?

Time's up gentlemen.

Now leave me to

my dark studies,

Before I change my mind.

So does this mean that we

still have to come to class?

Alright, ok.

PATRICK:
I hope this isn't

what we're expected to wear.

It's just a painting

for the wall.

It looks comfortable.

- Would you do that orc?

- Yes.

With a condom.

I'm sorry sir,

that's not something

That we usually keep in stock,

But uh, I can certainly special

order a loin cloth for you.

Yeah, oh, I definitely

recommend athletic support.

Or you could just

tape it to your leg.

Yeah, oh yeah.

Good day sir.

We are well met, young one.

How may I be of service to you?

The larping tournament thing,

Can we sign up for that here?

Oh, you wish to brave

the ancient lands,

Beyond the gale pass shores,

Where tribes of krakentroll

Slaughter unwary pilgrims

such as yourselves.

If that's where the tournament

is at, then I guess so.

Actually it's usually

out at the park

Behind the old elementary

school, but uh...

DAGMAR:

Foulest treachery!

Yes, no, the

book of rules states

That such a

maneuver is allowed.

You- You side with Jorgen

just to gain flavour.

Sorry about that.

Tempers can get

quite hot around here.

Yeah, well actually

we're not too familiar

With the sport of larping.

Ok, I've seen some pretty

scary stuff in here,

But will someone please give

me a little clarification

In what we're getting

ourselves into.

Live action role

playing, or larping,

Is not easily summarized,

It is many things

to many people.

Don't you guys just bang

each other with fake swords?

I saw an internet video

where a guy with a wizard's hat

Threw tin foil

balls at his cat.

ANDY:

Its not just about sword play,

Or mysteries of the

arcane and incantations.

Larping is more pure,

it's about casting aside

The shackles of the mundane,

Throwing yourself

in harm's way,

For the sake of

something more noble.

Yeah, so like capture the flag,

Except with fake swords.

And you could say that sex is

Wrestling without clothes on.

Dude, have you even had sex?

Trust me, I've wrestled

without clothes on.

My romantic life is not the

topic of discussion here.

He didn't mean any harm.

I am not naive as to the way

That larping is perceived

by the outside world.

And I will not allow

you to joke about

Something that

we hold so dearly.

Please leave.

No, no, you have

to let us sign up.

I am a level 80 wizard!

I don't have to do anything!

Go.

You too moor, go.

Thanks a lot man.

You always do this, why do you

always douche out like this?

Ok, you know what,

look, just chill,

I'm gonna sort it, alright?

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