Little Fockers Page #5

from the caller ID.

How are you doing?

Greg, excuse yourself

from the table by saying

these exact words,

"I don't know

if I still have it,

but let me check my files."

What?

If Pam asks you what I want,

tell her that I

asked you to locate

your birth certificate

for my genealogical work.

Just do it.

I don't know

if I have that, Jack,

but let me check my files.

Files? You have files?

Yes, yeah, I do.

I keep files.

He wants me to get

my birth certificate

for that family tree thing

he's doing.

Jack? Everything okay?

Everything is fine, Greg,

I suffered a minor

heart attack,

but I was able to

defibrillate myself

before going into

fatal cardiac arrest.

Jesus!

You defibrillated yourself?

The doctor said

I was a lucky man

and I've just

got to watch my diet

and keep my stress level down.

Wow, okay, so I guess

you guys aren't gonna be

able to come to

the twins' birthday party.

No, Dina and I

will be there

as planned, Greg.

And I was able to keep this

on a need-to-know basis.

And right now,

you're the only person

who needs to know.

Well, come on, Jack.

I mean, I think

Dina needs to know.

Greg, stop talking and listen.

Okay.

Now, my genealogical

research has allowed me

to track the Byrnes family

as far back as 1643.

Now, I wouldn't be

able to do that, say,

to your family,

what with all

the wandering peddlers

and nameless peasants.

Mmm-hmm.

But, as long as there

have been Byrneses,

there's always

been a patriarch

to lead our family through

good times and bad.

And I've finally

come to the realization

that the next in line

to the throne, Greg,

is you.

Me.

Yes, you, Greg.

Well...

So my question is this,

in the event of my demise,

are you prepared

to lead this family?

You know, Jack,

we're right

in the middle of dinner.

Maybe we could talk

about this, you know,

when you come into town.

If I go down, Greg,

I need to know someone

will be responsible

for the whole Byrnes clan.

So I ask you, Greg,

are you prepared to be

the Godfocker?

The Godfocker?

The Godfocker.

Well, that is a very powerful

turn of phrase, Jack.

And when you say Godfocker,

I mean...

I mean, I think

I know what you mean,

but I'm just...

What exactly does that mean?

It's an attitude, Greg.

It's a confidence.

It's the way

you carry yourself

that lets the world

know that the buck

stops with you.

Yeah, I hear you. Mmm-hmm.

None of this can be achieved

without the basics.

A secure home for your family,

a top-notch education

for your children...

Okay.

...and last but not least,

having your financial

house in order, Greg.

Is that it?

Are you laughing?

Yeah, no, I'm just...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes