A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum Page #3
- APPROVED
- Year:
- 1966
- 99 min
- 3,685 Views
Yes.
Forget about the minae and the seashells.
Just give me me.
- Give you you?
- My freedom.
Pseudolus, people do not go around
Be the first, start a fashion.
- Get me that girl.
- And if I do?
- You are free.
- I am what?
- Free.
- Free!
If Ive told you once
Ive told you a hundred times,
do not fan the girls when theyre wet!
Youll be a eunuch all your life.
Oh! You b*tch!
(coins jangle)
I know that sound.
And I love it.
Ugh! You.
How did you come into money?
An unexpected legacy.
My uncle Simo, the Carthaginian elephant
breeder, came to an untimely end.
He was crushed to death
on the last day of the mating season.
- This morning I bought my freedom.
- Congratulations... citizen.
With this much left over
for one gross indulgence.
Lycus, I am in the market
for a lifetime companion.
I say in all modesty, I have an assortment
of beauty second to none, and... Who?
Thought Id further his education.
You understand?
Who better than l?
Come in, little boy, wont you?
Eunuchs, quickly. A buyer!
(soothing music )
Was I a good year?
Now, for your approval and
possible purchase, from out of the East,
with the face of an idol, the arms of
a willow tree, the pelvis of a camel:
Tintinabula.
(drum roll)
(belly-dance music )
Was this the one?
No.
Dont you have anyone
in there a bit less noisy?
I have.
indescribable beauty. Lithe as a tigress.
Wondrous as a flamingo.
For he whose interest is the wildlife.
Thank you.
- No.
- Uh!
Frankly, I was hoping to live past
my wedding night. She seems a bit too...
No matter. I understand.
Consider the Gemini: a matched pair.
Look at them -
either one a divinely assembled woman,
together, an infinite number
of mathematical possibilities.
"(hoarsely)" No.
Im a man of limited means, and I dont
suppose youd want to break up a set.
I couldnt. You do understand?
Completely. Do go on.
And on, and on, and on, and on, and on.
Enough! I know what you want.
Behold Panacea.
Panacea, whose face holds
a thousand promises,
and a body that stands behind
each promise.
"(? big-band jazz)"
"(very hoarsely)" No.
(whistles)
Dont misunderstand - its the proportions.
I love the breadth, its the length.
She may be the right length, but is
she right for me? You see what I mean?
- Isnt she a bit too short?
- Definitely not.
- Too tall?
- Thats where youre perfect together.
Yes, but how often will we find
ourselves in "this" position?
No need to compromise.
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"A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 2 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/a_funny_thing_happened_on_the_way_to_the_forum_1900>.
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