Zoolander 2 Page #4

with our authentic truth?

No. I was gonna say

become the two biggest,

hottest models

in the world again.

Okay.

Okay. So what say

we get you cleaned up,

shave that

Billy goat beard,

go downstairs

and show these punks

what real fashion looks like?

Oh, my god. Yes, dude!

Yes! You guys look so lame.

I love it, dude.

You ninjas dressed up

all old-school

just to meet me.

So jedi.

You guys suck.

Both of you guys suck.

You look great.

Thanks.

I'm don atari. What up?

What up, hansel?

Yeah. That's sick.

Wait a minute.

"I'll call Billy...".

I just said that!

I know.

Like, 15 minutes ago, right?

Vip told me,

so I made these retro shirts

with your old

catchphrase on it.

Cool.

Hey, let me introduce

my collective, dude.

They're all losers,

i hate these guys.

We got trs-80, kitt...

Rubik, my man gleek.

Eh, this guy gives

the best shitty tattoos ever.

He's a genius.

His tattoos are so stupid.

He's the one who did

my colonel Sanders.

Look at that,

pretty epic, huh?

It sucks,

i don't like it, dude.

Why would I do this to myself?

I never wanted this on me.

I love it, dude. I got it

when my grandfather died.

That's really cool.

So, uh, what's the deal

with the show?

Yeah, where do you want us

to fire up this chainsaw?

Colosseum? Trevi fountain?

Spanish steps?

What? No way, dude.

Those places are

gnar-gnar Bo-Bo.

We're holding it

in an abandoned

medical waste facility

on top of

an industrial trash heap.

It's totally toxic,

but super chill.

Cool! Sounds dope.

Yeah, fresh.

Oh, what?

You guys are like,

"sounds dope!" "Fresh!"

They're doing the voices

and everything!

I didn't think you guys

would do the voices.

That's sick!

"Sounds dope! Sounds fresh!"

I don't like you guys.

It's an honor to have you.

Hey, retreads!

I want to introduce you all

to my muse

and basically, like,

the biggest supermodel

in the whole world

right now, dude.

This is all.

All what?

We are all.

So, are you like a male model

or a female model?

All is not defined

by binary constructs.

That's cool.

I don't like labels, either.

But I think he's asking,

do you have a hot dog

or a bun?

Do you have a wiener

or vergiener?

All is all to all.

By the way, all just

married hermself, dude.

Monomarriage is

finally legal in Italy.

I support that.

Derek, that's pretty good,

right?

Uh, I'm sorry,

are you not comfortable

with people like all

in the workplace

or something?

No. Of course, I am.

I mean, like,

if your son or whatever

came to you and said,

"hey, dad,

i really want to marry all,"

like, wouldn't you

be so stoked for that?

Isn't that, like,

exactly what you want?

Imagine all walking in,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes