Zombieworld Page #3

the door open. One sec.

Idiot!

Hey, this reminds me

of that time,

remember that party,

when I put dog sh*t

on the door handle?

Ooh, that was funny.

Not for the people

with shitty hands.

Or dysentery.

But man, I laughed.

I remember, everyone thinking

I was really rude,

for not shaking their hands,

but I knew best.

Ho ho, man, did I know.

Anyway, that's when I told

Dave about your...

...your thing. what was it?

That secret?

I remember it being

really important to you,

but I don't know why.

Maybe that's why I told him.

I know you never liked Dave.

But I was wasted,

and I was on a high

from the dog sh*t gag, so...

I guess...

...the band is not going to

take off now.

As soon as the zombies came,

I knew...

I knew it wouldn't...

Well, as long as

you were there, I thought...

I thought I'd have an audience

at least.

I know you thought

I was talentless, little kid,

but you listened.

You even didn't mind

when I played

on your first date with Katie.

She is dead.

I used to fancy her.

I spied on you two

having sex once.

Oh... she had awesome tits.

I wish, I had filmed that now.

It would have given me

something to watch

during the apocalypse.

I never had anyone.

Tried to find a girl,

but I always scared them off

because I was too keen.

All I wanted was...

was someone to like me,

to notice me.

Who will laugh at my

stupid jokes now?

I guess I've been

a bit of a sh*t friend.

Maybe I should've

apologized early

when you could understand.

Where is my rounder's bat?

It better not be your room

again, you...

Oh, it's there.

I can't do this alone.

I want my friend back.

I need someone to tell me

to grow up

and stop being a dick.

Someone to show me

how all this works.

Yeah...

I know I annoyed you

sometimes, mate

and sometimes you annoyed me.

You were always going on

about how good your job is

and how much better in life

you do than me, but...

...I didn't mind...

I didn't mind, mate because...

What's this?

What's this? A note?

"Chris"... For me?

"Dear Chris,

this is my suicide note.

I'd rather become

one of the undead

than spend the rest

of my life with you

and your stupid guitar.

I hate you.

And hope the zombie me eats you.

Steve."

It looks like

you're not only the one

who does best in life

after all, you dick!

This just in.

Ladies and gentlemen,

we are receiving a live feed

from a Quickstop

on Broadway and Carter.

That location is only

three blocks

from the station.

I repeat,

this is a live feed

from a Quickstop

only three blocks

from this reporter's location.

Unicorn.

Whiskey. Kilo.

Ma'am?

Ma'am?

Ma'am, roll down the window.

Please help my husband, please.

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