The Sword in the Stone Page #4

- And I say we go back to the woods.

No, not on your life.

That boy's got to have an education.

He has a future.

Well, you may be right.

A skinny kid like that would make

a cracking good chimney sweep.

Something tells me that

you're all wet, Archimedes.

- Who goes there?

- Pelinore!

It's Pelinore, dash it all!

I've got big news from London.

Big news!

Come on, man.

Drop the bridge.

Oh, big news, eh?

They can't wait for

the London Times. First edition

won't be out for at least, uh...

Archimedes, would you mind

sailing down there and, and...

Not interested!

Oh, come, come, come, come now.

You're as wet as you can get.

No! No, no, no!

Archimedes! I'll turn you

into a human.

- Hmph! You wouldn't dare!

- I will. So help me, I will.

Well, all right, all right.

All right!

All right.

It works every time.

Just like magic.

Pelinore!

Pelinore.

Greetings, old boy. And what's

all the noise about London, hmm?

Big news. Really big news.

Sit down, man,

and let's hear all about it.

They're having a big tournament

New Year's Day.

Oh, that's not news,

dash it all. They always do.

Yeah, but, Ector... Ector, here's

where all the excitement comes in.

To the winner of this tournament

goes the crown.

You mean... You mean

he'll be king of all England?

King of all England.

- Kay, lad, did you hear that?

- Pretty fair prize, I'd say.

Yes, and you can win it, boy,

if you knuckle down to your training.

And we'll have you knighted by Christmas

and off to London. What do you say?

Sure. Why not? Why not?

Wart, lad, how'd you

like to go to London?

- Oh, Sir Ector, you mean it?

- If you stick to your duties,

you can be Kay's squire.

Oh, I will, sir.

I will.

I don't want the Wart

for my squire.

Here's to London!

And here's to Kay.

And here's to the banner

of the Castle of the Forest Suavage.

- Cheers!

- Cheers, cheers.

- Cheers.

Charge!

Weight forward!

Lean into him!

Steady, boy. Steady!

Steady with the lance!

Grip her tight!

Hit him clean!

No, no, no!

Heads up!

Ar-Ar-Archimedes. Archimedes,

wh-where, where, where are we?

In a tumble-down old tower...

in the most miserable old castle

in all Christendom, that's where.

C-Castle? Castle?

Don't you even

remember the boy?

Uh, the boy?

Can't you remember

one blasted thing?

- Oh, now, just a moment. L...

- Tight grip on the lance.

- Oh.

- Loosen the saddle, knees in tight.

Weight forward

and stay on target.

You keep losing your grip.

It's not a mere matter

of muscle, sir.

Jousting is, uh, uh,

a fine skill.

It... It's a highly

developed science.

Science, indeed.

One dummy trying to knock off

another dummy with a bit of a stick.

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