The Sasquatch Gang Page #3

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Ain't that the truth?

Oh.

Blondeen.

These tracks are fresh too.

You can tell that

from the poop?

No, it rained last night.

That means...

this would have been dumped

early this morning.

So it's, like,

a morning dump?

I better get some caution tape

out of the cruiser,

rope this area off.

You guys stay here and make sure

nobody messes with it.

Blondeen, better get Artie

on the phone.

He's gonna want to see this.

Okay, Melvin.

You get a shot of this kid

standing in front of that find,

and I'll ask

the questions, okay?

What did you say

your name was?

Gavin Gore.

And have you ever seen anything

like this before, Gavin?

I think Hobie laid one

like that a while back.

Tell them about the corn.

As you can see right behind

my right shoulder,

there is a very large

selection of feces

from what we think

could be

the Sasquatch.

We're bringing

in Artimus Snodgrass

to determine whether this

is indeed a real find.

He is the world's

foremost authority

on Sasquatch

and Sasquatch scat.

And when will he be arriving?

Well, he should be

arriving here

within the next three days.

What led you to find

this Sasquatch feces?

Well, we were--

I came to get my video back.

No way, lamewad.

You lost.

We told you

we found Sasquatch footprints.

Look, it's on the news

right there.

Well, the truth

of the matter is--

Yeah, right.

Officer Chillcut's my uncle,

and he wouldn't know

the difference

between a deer track

and a snack pack.

So?

So.

He said he called that guy

from your stupid video.

Artimus Snodgrass?

He said he'll be here

in a couple of days

to see if the tracks

are real or not.

This is so stupid.

We didn't even bet on whether

the tracks were real.

We just bet on whether

we found some tracks.

I don't give a rat's boot

what the bet was, all right?

If he says it ain't real,

we get your videos.

Come on, just give me

my video back.

I don't even want

your stupid Chinese Star.

All right, let me go get it.

Yeah.

What?

Hello?

I'm out back

grilling brats, Shirts.

Are you Ezekiel Wilder?

Zerk Wilder, yeah.

Who wants to know?

I'm Mr. Ernie Dalrymple.

I represent Bilford, Cohen,

and Gregg Collection Agency.

Sir, do you have

in your possession

a credit card issued

by the New Bank of Flanders?

Yeah, I know I got one,

but I don't ever use it,

'cause it's

for emergencies only.

Sir,

It was used July 17, 1999,

At a Burgerville, for $5.17.

What?

Could I have one semi-huge

Walla Walla onion ring...s

and four fresh

raspberry milk shakes?

Oh, yeah.

The reason I'm here today,

Mr. Wilder,

is that

for the last six years,

the bank has attempted

to reach you by letter...

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