The House Bunny Page #3

- So nice.

Try Zeta. Their last housemother was

hospitalized with hallucinations.

Awesome.

Awesome.

Hello?

Dean Simmons. Please, please.

We are trying so hard. I promise you.

This seems really unfair.

And I'm not gonna attack you.

I don't want you to feel attacked by

all of us, so I'm just gonna say me.

To me, this feels really unfair.

Natalie. Look,

I feel the same way you do.

But the fact remains...

you guys have not met your requirements

for three years running now.

And I'm under a lot of pressure

from other sororities...

complaining that we're bending

the rules for you.

By "other sororities",

do you happen to mean Phi lota Mu?

I really don't think

it matters who complained.

Natalie, rules are rules.

Drama queen.

Oh, I'm sorry I scared you.

Do you think you could help me

out of here, though?

What? Yeah.

Thanks.

I'm so sorry,

I think I broke your Z.

Oh. No, it's okay. It falls off, like,

every time we open the door.

Well, at least you still have T and A.

T and an A. Who are you?

My name is Shelley,

and I'm here to be your housemother.

Well, it's nice to meet you, Shelley.

But, unfortunately, he...

It's a little too late.

We're about to lose our charter,

so if we don't have a house...

we won't really be needing

a housemother.

Well, why are they gonna

take your house away?

Because we get no pledges,

and everyone kind of thinks we're losers.

That's so sad. Why does everyone

else get all the pledges?

Well, they have great parties, and...

boys actually like them.

I'm an expert at parties and boys.

I'm a Bunny.

Men write to me from prison,

sometimes in their own blood.

I mean, I assume it's theirs, who knows?

I don't.

I'm sorry, I'm nervous right now...

because I really wanna help you guys,

because I know I can do it.

Wow, a Bunny?

Like a centerfold?

Oh, bless your heart, no.

Just a couple of small pictorials...

"Girls of the Midwest," "Girls with GEDs",

"Girls of Charlie Sheen".

But now I'm a homeless person.

God, I'm so sorry.

Good luck.

Wait, but I can really help you guys.

So if we don't get pledges,

we lose our charter?

- We need 30.

- Thirty pledges? There's seven of us, dude.

Technically, 71l2 now.

Hey!

Oh, nothing a little fertilizer

can't help.

Not you, Tanya.

I was talking about Harmony.

Actually, 73l4 as of Tuesday

last week.

Guys, we're never gonna get

that many pledges.

This is just their way

of shutting us down.

This is awful.

Hey, Joanne, just FYI...

you've got refrigerator magnets

stuck to your brace again.

Actually, we need that.

That's our grocery list.

I knew that. I knew that.

- No, you didn't.

- Did so.

- Why do we need knee-highs?

- Oh, my God.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes