The Final Member Page #4

There was an old lady

who came to her local sheriff

demanding a divorce

from her husband.

The sheriff inquired

as to the reason for this.

"It's the damnedest thing

I've ever seen" said the old lady.

The sheriff asked

whether the object in question

was such a freak of nature

that it was unusable or what.

"Don't even try mentioning

that thing" said the old woman.

"It's no more

than three thumbs worth. "

And the old woman said

that she would be satisfied with

nothing less than a legal length.

The sheriff said that he wasn't

aware of any article in the law

stating anything

about a legal length.

"Isn't three thumbs worth enough?"

"Absolutely not" said the old woman.

"One in the hair, one in the skin,

"and a third, and a fourth,

and a fifth one in.

"Now that's what I call action.

"That's legal length for you,

my good man. "

What I think is interesting

about this story is...

like certain other folk tales

that we have

in the Icelandic tradition

from this time,

recorded by priests and other

learned people and sent on by them,

is that there's clearly a lot more

understanding of the woman,

of the woman's part

in sexual activities,

that she deserves to get something

out of it as well as the man.

We get the same sort of story

comes up with, in...

in terms of tales with...

about elves.

On this tale, old folk tale, is

based my insistence or requirement

of having a mould of five inches.

There was an English TV station.

They tried to take a mould of

Mr Arason with Plaster of Paris.

But this guy didn't know

how to do it properly.

Try to stretch it.

Yes, pull it up.

Well, I mean take the penis

and make it longer.

Its very easy to get it off.

Dont worry.

In a few minutes it will be hard as a rock

and then Ill be back.

Hello?

Well, this should be ready now.

Dont break it.

Im more worried about

pulling your penis off.

You can help

if you feel a place where its stuck.

Just the pubic hair!

Wait a second...

But its loose here.

Enough!

He was furious.

The mould was ruined.

I'm afraid I can't verify him

being of a legal length

at that time or now.

Hi Siggi, this is Tom.

Finally we are talking together.

What's happening

with the fellow from Iceland?

Has he said anything recently?

He's still alive, 93 years old.

Don't worry about him.

It's very important to me

that Elmo be the first

human specimen in your museum.

Yeah.

It's extremely important,

the reason is...

I have dreams and wishes that...

He wants to get the fame.

That's his main point.

Being the first is the only answer

to get this attention.

So I understand him in the way...

in that way.

But there is one difference here.

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