The Big Gay Musical Page #4

they wont even know who

wrote the damn thing!

? We'll get His chosen people. ?

? Those men, we'll make them pay. ?

? I will teach all of the children ?

? to hate those who are gay. ?

? All of those showtune singing ?

? gays! ?

Hey.

Hi.

You 're cute.

Thanks.

I'm just here to relax.

I can help with that.

I'm actually seeing someone.

I'm not gonna tell him.

I'm not here to hook up.

C'mon, just let me suck you off.

No!

Just leave me the f*** alone.

I tried to be nice but... Christ!

Dick.

Can I talk to you about something?

Sure, what is it?

My parents are coming

to opening night.

That's great!

It is. I mean they've always

been so supportive,

but I never expected them to

come all the way for this.

It is your first New York opening.

You shouldn't be surprised.

I know, but my parents

are very religious.

Oh, so do your parents know

what the show is about?

I told them it was "Adam and

Eve - The Way God Made 'Em".

Yeah, there gonna be surprised.

And they don't know about me either.

This is gonna be good.

I'm sorry.

I'm serious.

I'm freaking out.

They wouldn't let us

read Harry Potter,

because it was all magic

and against God.

Well if they think Harry

Potter is sacrilegious,

I cant wait to hear their

review of this show.

I try to be good,

I don't have sex...

But you've had sex right?

What?

Seriously?

I wanted to wait for the right guy.

But I don't really go out and meet

people so I never really found one.

Wow. But haven't you

ever been curious?

No.

Yes.

I don't know.

Look, sex is the last thing on my mind

right now. What am I gonna do?

I wish I knew what to tell you.

My parents are gonna hate me.

No they're not. It's all gonna

be OK. Trust me.

Look, we gotta go.

We'll talk later?.

Yeah.

Ok.

God I wish this wasn't happening.

And just as the prophecies foretold,

five thousand years later,

God putAdam and Steve back on the

Earth to prove their love was real,

and able to beat the obstacles

of the modern world.

They were put in different places,

and in homes that used the Breeders

lnformational Book of Living Examples.

? I was sitting backstage ?

? and wondering what to say ?

? so I raised my hands to Heaven ?

? and I began to pray. ?

? And Jesus said to ?

? praise Him. ?

? Jesus said to ?

? love Him. ?

? Jesus said to ?

? glorify Him. ?

? Yes, Jesus said. ?

? Oh, Jesus said ?

? find salvation. ?

? He said make a...

donation. ?

? Jesus said, oh Jesus said.

Oh, yes he said! ?

And Jesus said to me,

"Patty Maye,

Patty Maye, I want you to go out

and tell the people how you feel.

Tell them how you feel

about being a Christian."

So Jesus, this one's for you.

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