ThanksKilling Page #3

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Sh*t, sh*t, sh*t.

He's probably worried sick.

I'll be right back, I don't have

service right here.

Be careful.

Yeah, and don't wander

off too far.

There might be an evil Turkey on

the loose.

Where have you been,

Kristen?

I've been waiting around two

hours!

Sorry, daddy, our

car broke down and we decided to

camp out for the night.

I'll be back on the road first

thing tomorrow though, and I'm

totally fine, so don't worry.

Promise, punkin?

Punkin?

Yes, yes, I promise,

daddy.

I'll see you tomorrow.

We'll go to that banquet

together.

Be careful.

Love you, bye.

Love you, bye.

Okay, girl, get a

grip.

There is no such thing as an

evil Turkey.

There is no such thing as an

evil Turkey.

There's...

No such thing as an evil

Turkey.

Oh, wait, I lied.

Shut the f*** up!

You stupid b*tch!

I'm gonna drink your blood like

cranberry sauce, meanie.

Jesus, Kristen, what

happened to you?!

You were right,

Darren!

Your story was true.

There is an evil Turkey on the

loose!

Wow, Kristen.

You're, like, almost as dumb as

I am.

Yeah, it was just a

story, Kristen.

I doubt it's even true.

Shut up, you guys!

I think she might be serious.

Where's the Turkey?

I don't know.

He was right behind me.

He was chasing me.

I don't know where he went.

Well, I don't see

anything.

Let's just go to bed.

Everything's gonna be okay.

You don't believe

me, do you?

I do believe you.

Look me in the eyes.

Do you believe me?

I...

Out of everybody

here, I thought you would

believe me!

Screw you, Johnny!

You can screw me,

Johnny.

Eeeee!

Whoa!

Oh, look, it's a baby

bunny.

Do you think he's okay?

I mean, he looks kind of funny,

doesn't he?

Yeah!

That's because his stomach got

gnawed open.

Look at all of his guts hanging

out.

This little baby bunny got its

stomach gnawed open by a beak.

Not just any beak...

A Turkey beak.

Fuckballs!

Maybe Kristen was right.

Look, guys.

Just calm the "f" down.

Jesus, we're in the woods.

This type of sh*t happens all

the time.

Let's just go to bed.

Yeah, demonic turkeys.

Gutted animals.

Yeah, let's sleep on it.

Great idea.

Well, I'm tired.

I'm pretty wasted anyway, so,

uh, goodnight, all.

So, looks like it's

just the two of us.

Don't even think about

it, Billy.

You can feel up your own b*obs

tonight.

Well, what about

tomorrow?

I'll think about it.

Good night.

Who the hell are you?

You can just call me

your guardian angel, kid.

That damn Turkey come along last

night and was ready to peck your

heart out.

You're crazy!

Am I?

Then what's them Turkey

droppings doing on your chest,

son?

Oh, gross.

Oh, god.

See, I told you.

That goddamn Turkey was out here

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