Sex And Death 101 Page #2
Exactly. Yes.
- Hmm.
- Thank you.
Mm-hmm.
You sure you don't have
a Carlotta Valdes shacked up somewhere?
I mean, according to the list,
she's next up.
- [clicking mouse]
- Carlotta Valdes.
Followed by Cynthia Rose.
Followed by--
Well, whoever did this
sure put in the hours.
Print it.
[speaking Japanese]
Sayonara!
- [door closes]
- [drops objects]
[Narrating]
So, now you know.
The last goddamn e-mail.
The list.
Every woman I ever,
[Trixie on phone]
You're not still staring at that list.
- [beep]
- No comment.
Oh, did I remember to warn you
that you're gonna be kidnapped
from work for your bachelor party?
[door opens]
[screaming, whooping]
Whoa!
Hey, Roderick.
How are you doing?
[men chattering]
- Ready to party, Rod?
- Oh, no, no.
No one said anything about
this going down at my house.
- Lester.
- What?
This is my house.
Fiona gave us permission.
Oh, you're insane.
[chuckling]
- Interesting e-mail today.
- Mmm!
Worry not.
I found a new stripper.
Oh, no. Not the stripper crisis.
The, uh, kooky one. The list.
- What list?
- The list of--
- What are you talking about?
- [doorbell]
- Names.
- Well, our fair lady's here, gentlemen!
Turn that up!
Rule six.
No ham radio operating.
- Get it? Breasts?
- [Men] Aww...
No ham radio operating.
Rule seven.
No checking the oil.
- [Man] Checking the oil?
- Get it?
Vagina!
No checking the oil.
- And I loved the touch of adding to the list
- Rule eight...
the names of women
I've yet to have sex with.
- No cotton candy.
- What do you mean, man? What list?
Oh. Yeah. "What list?"
Hey! You two jokers
in the back!
Show Precious some respect!
This is a bachelor party.
It ain't fun and games.
Who wants to play
musical lap dances?
- [men hoot]
- [rock]
[man snoring]
[rowdy yelling]
- [music stops]
- Aw! Too bad!
- [smooch]
- [men chatter]
Goodbye!
[rock]
[vomiting]
Mm. You call this decadence?
Bro, it was you!
If only women knew.
The bachelor party.
The best commercial for marriage.
Cream for your coffee?
Mm! Uh, no thanks. Carbs.
You laughing at the old coot?
Yeah, I'm sorry. I am.
Hey, what about you?
You're walking around
your own party, here,
obsessing about
your former conquests.
Well, it's actually
a little more complicated.
I was fine until this morning.
I got this crazy list of women--
No! No! No!
I don't wanna see it.
You don't wanna see it.
Hell, you probably sent it
to yourself when you were drunk.
If you're looking for a way out...
Rod, you'll find it.
No, it-- it's nothing like that.
Stop looking.
Hang in here for another hour.
Get married next week.
Have a kid.
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"Sex And Death 101" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/sex_and_death_101_17857>.
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