Senior Skip Day Page #5

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Who're you talking to?

It's my principal,

Mr. Dickwalter.

Give me that.

Tell me what's really going

on over there, you little sh*t.

How 'bout you

go f*** yourself!

How 'bout-hello? How

'bout I go f*** myself?

I don't f*** myself, my friend.

I don't f*** myself ever.

You f*** yourself. People

f*** themselves. Not me!

[cell phone rings]

Motherf***er!

Listen to me. You call this f***ing

number one more goddamn time...

and I'm gonna back my brand new

Escalade over your motherfucking skull!

I don't...

Hm-mm, where you going? To do some

more generalizing about black folks?

Number one, yes. Number

two, shut up! Number three,

I think that Adam

Harris was duped...

and there really is a Senior

Skip Day party going on.

And I'm just the

guy to bust it.

Hey, Snippy, we should

have the party right here.

I appreciate the thought...

but'd you really think my house

is appropriately situated...

for such a festive gathering?

Let me check.

Jes... Dude!

Your house has wheels!

Come on...

Should have held onto

that kid when I had him.

[blaring rap music]

Turn that crap down!

Yeah, you better leave!

So, what're you thinking?

I'm thinking... I'm thinking...

that we're gonna make

the biggest gravity bong...

that this world has ever seen.

With all this sh*t?

Oh yeah.

That'll get you high.

Okay, fellas, alright, we

got alcohol, we got music...

we got the world's biggest

gravity f***ing bong...

that I've ever seen, or I wanna

see, to tell you the truth.

But listen, there's just one

more thing missing here.

You see what I mean?

I know, oh yeah... yeah.

Bang them out.

A little pick 'em and stick'em.

You know what I mean now?

Yes, I do.

Hi, huh, is this the

Bornstein Modeling Agency?

Yeah... hi, I was wondering if you had any

girls available for a party this afternoon.

No. Okay.

Well, that makes

perfect sense.

Yes, thank you.

Okay, bye.

So?

They do not

do parties.

They told you to f*** off,

didn't they?

Yes, they did... they did.

Hey Bornstein?

Where the f***

are my models?

Oh, the ones I called

about over a month ago.

For the f***ing

lingerie shoot.

Look, I'm paying for a crew

to sit here and do nothing.

They better be here

in 30 minutes...

or it'll be your arse!

Yeah. 10 Forrest

Lane, Fucko!

Gentlemen, I'm gonna go beat

off before they get here.

Oh my God, I'm so sorry

we're late.

Sorry, we had a hard

time finding your street.

We're so ready to go.

So, where do you want us?

H hideous.

Absolutely hideous.

Oh what, did we make a little pit

stop at the Krispy Kreme on the way?

Oww.

Silence!

Let's do this!

Yes, beautiful.

Yes, yes, do that. Now,

give me a little giggle.

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