Robodoc Page #5
That's funny, it is.
It's no joke, doctor.
I'm Jason Dockery,
M.D. 63's chief technician.
I'm here to get you acquainted
with his features.
Features?
I asked Buttkiss for a doctor with a pulse,
I don't need an
overgrown coffee maker.
Coffee? Would you like it black?
Or with cream and sugar?
Buttkiss!
Maybe he wanted tea?
Buttkiss! You promised me a doctor!
You've given me a vending machine
with a stethoscope.
So you've met M.D. 63.
I hear he's a very expensive,
highly-specialized device.
I don't need a device.
I need a living, breathing doctor.
Well, forget it!
Look around, Richard.
Lawsuits, malpractice rates,
decreasing reimbursements.
All the breathing doctors are quitting.
Just give it a chance. Maybe you'll learn
something from this robot doctor.
And I need another nurse!
One made of flesh would be nice.
Half-caf, triple grande,
three sugars, soy.
No whipped mocha.
Me, too.
Come on, Doctor Coffee,
we're late for rounds.
Back straight, stomach out a tiny bit,
put your feet down,
right in the middle...
Gentlemen! Let us begin.
Allow me to introduce the
newest addition to our staff.
This is what corporate now
refers to as a physician.
Wait a minute,
you have got to be kidding.
Is he a...
Yes, right down to his CPU.
Dr. Keefe, your presentation.
Speaking of P.U.,
Mrs. Flaherty is a morbidly obese,
flatulent, malodorous...
Alright, okay, we get the point,
she's fat and smelly.
Mrs. Flaherty is a 52-year-old woman
who is suffering from abdominal pain.
Let me take a look.
Mrs. Flaherty,
does it hurt when I do this?
Does it hurt when I do this?
Mrs. Flaherty,
when was the last time you ate?
About ten minutes ago.
Ah. And what did you eat?
I had a rack of lamb,
a side of beef,
four fried chickens,
and some Chinese.
Ah, some Chinese food?
Or some Chinese people?
Doctors, it appears that
Mrs. Flaherty has...
an old-fashioned stomach-ache.
If we're all in agreement, let's get her
some antacid and get her out of here.
I disagree.
Oh, the toaster speaks.
This woman has acute appendicitis.
I've seen her naked.
Trust me, she doesn't have a cute anything.
Okay, I am not going to
stand here and justify myself
to some motorized mannequin.
I am Chief of Surgery,
and I say she's out of here.
She's outta here!
If you do not open her up, I will.
You couldn't open a can of beans, tin man.
Well, actually...
Fine!
Go right ahead.
But who's going to help you, huh?
MD-63 doesn't need any help.
He shifts automatically
between anesthesiologist,
One red hot appendix, doctor.
What is he doing now?
Since MD-63 is programmed to perform
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"Robodoc" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 14 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/robodoc_17056>.
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