Road Trip Page #2
- Yes, sir.
- Well, you better be ready.
Because I was
looking over the books last night
and you need a B on this test
just to pass this class.
Actually,
I double-checked that, Professor.
He needs a B+.
We can't bend on this.
I got it.
- Just copy off someone.
- I can't. It's all essays.
If I fail this class,
my average is shot.
or not be allowed back.
Well, you're f***ed, then.
So come to my party, hook up
with Beth, and enjoy your last week.
I'm not hooking up with anyone.
I'm invested in this relationship.
Invested? Who are you, Charles
Schwab? Listen to yourself!
I would give my life...
for one evening
of consensual sex with that girl.
I've gone this long without cheating.
You're already cheating!
Any time you pass up sex
you cheat yourself.
The window of opportunity
to drink and do drugs
and take advantage
of young girls is shrinking daily.
I gotta make a call.
I'm telling you, you pass this up,
it'll haunt you forever.
Your dick will never forgive you.
What do you think, man? Don't you
want to experience something new?
(Squeaky voice)
It ain't easy being Josh's penis.
We've been here two months,
and I feel like I'm in a coma.
- Stop it.
- I wish I was your dick, EL.
If something doesn't happen soon,
I'm gonna leave.
- Enough.
- (Girl) 'Hello? '
Carla, it's Josh. Sorry to bother
you, is Tiffany around?
Tiffany is not here.
She didn't sleep here
last night...again.
And it would be great
if for one hour you didn't call.
- Right.
- If she wanted to talk to you
she'd call you.
Deal with it.
- You b*tch!
- Does she sound hot??
We've never gone this long
without talking. Something's wrong.
like you should.
The clock is ticking. Before you know
it you'll be 40 and paying for girls.
# She good-looking
got a mojo cooking
# Yeah, wouldn't give me
the time of day
# But if my occupation
was stars and constellations
# We could get together
in the Milky Way
# And everybody wanna know somebody
# Everyone wants to drop your name
# You need no reservation
no special invitation
# No college education
if you've got fortune and fame... #
Oh, yeah! Whoo-hoo!
it's been known to affect
your decision-making abilities
and lower your inhibitions.
Good. That's the plan.
No, that-that's...
Yes, that is the plan.
- You bring cash?
- Why?
- We've got chicks for sale.
- What??
# Hey, now I'm snappy
got my mojo... #
Trust me. I've been goin'
and I know the key
to a well-rounded college education
is experimentation.
Let me show you.
This is an auction. Remember...
you are not buying the girl,
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"Road Trip" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 2 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/road_trip_17028>.
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