Ricky Gervais Live 2: Politics Page #5
- Year:
- 2004
- 68 min
- 384 Views
But it doesn't,
so it's not, okay?
I was on a plane last year
going from New York
to L.A.
And me and my girlfriend
were on one side of the plane.
There was the aisle.
And the other side...
There were these two huge, fat men.
One of them just got on and went,
"Can I have a belt extension?"
"Yeah, of course you can.
You've earned it."
So... proper...
In fact, I was thinking
and going, "Should one of us
swap with one of them?
Otherwise we're just
going to Canada.
Do you know
what I mean?"
And one of them was even
fatter than the other one.
She was there and she'd
got on the plane
with one of those take-away
buckets of fast food.
Bucket!
I mean,
there's your first clue.
When did that happen?
When did fat people
just give up?
When did they go into a shop
and go, "Oh, f*** it.
Just treat me like
a farmyard animal."
"Really?"
"Give me it in a bucket.
In fact, just strap it to my f***in' head
and I'll just..."
"A bucket? Really?
You want your meal
in a bucket?"
"Yes."
So she's there
and she's chowing down.
And I swear she turns
to her fat friend and says,
"This is the best fried chicken
I've had all day."
But I'm not having a go.
I'm not having a go.
No, I'm not.
No, I'm not.
Because even though
it is their own fault...
and it is their own fault...
I don't know if you know this
about fat people...
They f***ing love cake.
They love it.
They love it, right?
And I blame
the food industries,
because you go
into a supermarket
and it's just packed
with that stuff.
Everything's packed
with hydrogenated fats
and butter and everything.
And they...
they love that.
And there's always a big door,
isn't there, to a supermarket.
There's always a...
They've got a quadruple door, isn't it?
No one's ever been too fat to get through
the door of a supermarket, okay?
And it opens automatically,
so they don't have to
waste calories
pushing anything.
There's just...
And it's a good job it opens automatically
because usually it's glass and they
can see the pie from down the road
and they're in like that.
Grazing, right?
So I say keep the big door.
Keep the big door.
Sure, keep the big door.
Come on, fat people. Come... In you go.
But when they get in there,
It's all whole grain.
It's all stuff
that's good for you.
Of course they'll
be confused at first.
They'll go, "What?"
That's not real food to them.
is packaging.
They're... they're looking...
"Where's the cakes?
Where's the cakes?"
The cakes are over here.
The cakes are through
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