Richard Pryor: Live in Concert Page #3

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it's, god, please.

They're like that,

Dobermans are like that.

When they're puppies

they're real scared, man.

You look at them,

they're.

But when they get older,

They don't even like for you

to stare at them, right.

Most dogs you can stare down,

You look at a dog too long

they go.

You stare at a Doberman,

Doberman be

I don't play that sh*t.

And then they show you

their teeth, right,

This look like Im smiling,

mother f***er.

I'm about to get in your ass.

And they make real good

watch dogs, right,

But the only problem is

They let burglars come in

your house.

They do.

They burglar, yeah,

come on in, come on, yeah,

Come on in the bedroom,

Let me show you

where the money is,

Yeah, come on in.

Get all that, yeah,

Come on in the kitchen,

get silver,

Hurry up, come on, yeah,

come on.

And they wait for the burglar

to hit the door,

That's when they turn

into the exorcist, right.

The burglar go, they go,

you can't leave.

I want to play.

And that's how you find

the burglar

When you get home, right.

He'll be talking about, help me.

Please help me.

The mother f***ers

sound like the fly, help me.

The dog is going to bite

my a**hole out, help me.

Pets is something else, jack.

I got pets,

I love my little pets.

I got monkeys and sh*t.

My monkeys died, though.

Yeah.

I had two squirrel monkeys.

You ever seen

the squirrel monkeys?

They got them hands,

they freak a dog out.

They do.

They get on a dog

and them fingers touch a dog,

The dog go.

I had one named friend.

I named him friend cause the

first time I opened the cage,

He ran up my arm and stuck

his dick right in my ear.

He did.

Yeah, it felt like a wet tip

He pissed all on my cheek.

I had to throw him up

at the ceiling

He'd do that to anyone.

I'd invite over people,

you know,

Just to f*** with them,

you know.

I'd say, go on,

open the cage up, you know.

Up they arm,

I remember one time

This guy from warner brothers

was coming over,

He was going to do a film with me.

And he came over

and he opened the cage

And I said, don't open the cage!

The monkey

Well, you won't be doing

any films at warner brothers,

That's for goddamn sure.

Want to get this monkey's dick

out of my ear, rich.

Jesus Christ.

Come on, dear,

We'll put something

over my head there.

We'll just say it's a hump,

let's go.

So I got him a woman, you know,

cause he was f***ed up...

I got him a woman

Called her "sister," right.

He did the same to her,

Run right in the cage

And she said, freeze.

First thing, I got to

show you where the p*ssy is.

And he got him some

monkey p*ssy and freaked.

He just went out

of his mind, man.

Man, at night he'd be up

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