Pigs Page #4

I never eat anything with faces

And fish don't have faces

Only profiles

Thank you

Ugh

So, what's the story

with that car of yours?

What's wrong with my car?

It's a relic!

It's a classic

A Porsche is a classic

Yours is a fossil

When we were driving here I felt like

I was driving to church with my grandpa

Okay, that's enough

All right?

I can't take any more

of your constant complaining

I don't have to take this from an "N"

I could throw a bun

and hit another "N"

Maybe if you were an "X" or a "U"

But an "N"?

You've got to be kidding me

Take a cab home,

if you can find one you like

And I'm taking this

Wendy, hey! What a surprise

What are you doing here?

Well, um

I just haven't

heard from you in a while

I called a couple times

but I guess you've been pretty busy

Yeah, I've, uh I've been

a little preoccupied, you could say

I guess

Well here, I, uh

I baked you a pie

- A pie?

- Yeah

Wow, wow, that's swell

It's a peach pie, so "P" could be

for peach, or for Peterson, right?

"P" for Peterson

Yes, sir

Uh, you shouldn't have

I wanted to

Hey, you want to go maybe

grab a coffee or something?

Well, you know,

I'm, uh I'm pretty bagged,

and, uh, I've already had

a pretty rough night, so

Well, if it's something

you want to talk about

Not really No, thanks though

Okay, um

Well good night?

Yeah, yeah, good night

I mean, pie Wow

Peach pie

I'll give you call later,

see how you liked the

Pie

Did you know you have no face?

That's right,

you only have profiles

Not only that, I got a psycho Betty Crocker

hanging outside my room

Well I'm telling you buddy, for a lunatic,

she makes a kick-ass pie

I just hope

she didn't poison it

Where's Benny?

Oh, I think

he's at the pub with the guys

F*** it, it's early,

I still may be able to grab a stat

You coming?

Cleaver:
Yeah, I don't mind

getting my horn scraped tonight

Miles:

Roadie?

Cleaver:

Don't mind if I do

Cleaver:

Your camera

Oh, thanks

Oh sh*t, the "P's" back!

F***! No

You should've seen

the look on your face

This is my sh*t

I am so getting some p*ssy!

All I ask is that

you don't get anything on that shirt

I'm not going to get

anything on your shirt

Miles:

Where's the crew?

Lot of nice talent here tonight, ah?

Not too shabby

Next pitcher's on me

How you doin'

Ben Chia-dick

Hi, I'm Miles

Hi, Rebecca

Nice to meet you, Rebecca

Nice to meet you

You got a last name, Rebecca?

Stenson

Sorry?

- Stenson

- Barmaid:
$1250

That's a shame

Oh Hey, Miles, how about that girl

over there with the big breasts?

Whoa, check out

the crazy funbags on that chick!

That's nice

Those are so mine

Those are so f***in' yours

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes