Nice Dreams Page #4

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Hey, man, show some respect, man.

That's a cash crop, se.

No, I'm serious, man. Piss on them.

What?

I read somewhere, man,

that if you pee on a plant

it'll do better because

of some kind of vitamin

in your pee.

I just read it somewhere.

Yeah, you got a point there, man.

Just let your hair grow

and nobody'll ever find out.

Piss on them. Psh.

Hey, there could be something to it.

CHONG:
You know what I think

we should invest in, man?

CHEECH:

What?

CHONG:
A rest home for old hippies.

CHEECH:
Yeah?

CHONG:
Because, man, hippies have

been around since the '60s, man,

and there really isn't, like, a hip place

for them to go when they get real old,

you know?

You know, the way I see it,

it's like a regular rest home, except

you got all the dope you can smoke.

Like, we could call it

Laid Back Manor.

Yeah. Hey, great. Yeah.

That'd be heavy.

Because, you know, I mean, like...

What do people do when they get old?

They usually keep them stoned,

laid-back.

They could nod off.

Yeah, nod off, man.

[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]

CHEECH:
Hey, man, listen.

When we talk to Weird Jimmy,

let me do all the talking, okay?

CHONG:
Yeah.

CHEECH:
Because he gets spaced out.

Just... Whatever I say,

just go along with it, okay?

CHONG:
Yeah, okay.

CHEECH:
Because he gets zoned.

Just let me do all the talking.

Everything'll be cool, all right?

CHONG:
You know

what I wanna do when I die?

What?

I'm wanna get cremated, man.

Yeah?

Then I wanna get my ashes

put in a baggie, you know.

Yeah?

And then I wanna have all my friends...

We'll have a party and everybody will

smoke me. Mix it with some good sh*t.

Remind me not to be one

of your friends when you die.

Or you can snort me too.

Ugh.

Or shove you.

Oh, he's doing great, huh?

Yeah.

CHEECH:
Hey, Jimmy!

What you doing, man?

Making a peace pipe?

What's happening, homes?

This place is getting weirder, man.

No sh*t.

Hey, how you been, Jimmy?

Hey, you know those buds

you gave us the other day?

They were great, I swear to God.

Small. Small.

Hey, man, those were the biggest buds

I ever saw. Do you think we could

get some more of those, man?

Those are really good, I swear to God.

We gave them to some of our friends...

[ELECTRIC BUZZ]

Damn, electric weed, man.

It'll be monster weed, huh?

Those buds you gave us,

they were very hip.

I swear to God, we were

doing these tests under

clinical party conditions.

Like, we gave them

to a bunch of our friends.

So, do you think... They'd like

some more... Do you think we can

get some more of those buds, man?

No. No. No buds.

No buds. No buds.

Hey, we're, like... They're not for us.

They're, like, for needy weedheads

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