Napoleon Dynamite Page #6

Synopsis: Preston, Idaho's most curious resident, Napoleon Dynamite, lives with his grandma and his 32-year-old brother (who cruises chat rooms for ladies) and works to help his best friend, Pedro, snatch the Student Body President title from mean teen Summer Wheatley.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Jared Hess
Production: Fox Searchlight Pictures
  10 wins & 22 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.9
Metacritic:
64
Rotten Tomatoes:
71%
PG
Year:
2004
96 min
$44,478,018
Website
8,051 Views


- She's at a friend's house right now.

- [Rico] Well, hey, Napoleon.

- Napoleon's my nephew.

- Oh, that's nice.

Could you just give this

to her for me?

- I certainly could.

- Thanks.

Bye-bye.

Poor kid. I've been takin' care of him

while his grandma's in the hospital.

He still wets the bed

and everything.

You're kidding.

Yeah, he's a tender little guy.

He still gets beat up and whatnot.

Anyway, uh...

so we still feelin' pretty good about this,

uh, 32-piece set here?

- Ow!

- What the crap was Uncle Rico

doin' at my girlfriend's house?

Napoleon, let go of me!

I think you're bruisin' my neck meat!

Fine.

What the heck

are you guys doin'?

Tryin' to ruin my life

and make me look like a friggin' idiot?

I'm out makin' some

sweet moola with Uncle Rico.

Geez, I think

you ripped my mole off.

- I did?

- Yeah, is it bleeding?

- [Door Opens]

- A little bit.

Hey, Kip.

I wish you wouldn't

look at me like that, Napoleon.

I wish you'd get out of my life

and shut up.

I'm gonna tell you somethin'. While you're playin'

patty-cake with your friend Pedro...

your Uncle Rico...

is makin' 120 bucks.

I could make that much money

in five seconds.

Geez. Yeah, right, Napoleon.

I made, like, 75 bucks today.

Napoleon, it looks like

you don't have a job.

So why don't you

get out there and feed Tina.

Why don't you go eat

a "decroded" piece of crap.

[Napoleon's Voice]

There's a lot more where this came from...

if you go to the dance with me.

Yours truly, Napoleon Dynamite.

You know you're gonna

go to that dance with that boy.

[Groans]

By noon I need them 8,000 hens

moved into their new cages.

Sometimes they don't

want to cooperate.

But you give 'em a good shakin',

they'll settle down for ya.

Do the chickens have

large talons?

- Do they have what?

- Large talons.

I don't understand

a word you just said.

Okay, you meet me back here

about noon, and, uh...

we'll have a little lunch

waitin' for ya.

[Clucking]

Ew!

[Slurps]

Well, dig in.

[Flies Buzzing]

[Hens Whimpering, Distant]

[Cow Lowing]

Over there, in that pigpen...

I found a couple

of Shoshoni arrowheads.

[Gags]

[Sighs]

Can't find my checkbook.

Hope you don't mind I pay you in change.

Six dollars.

That's, like, a dollar

an hour.

[Phone Rings]

[Rings]

Hello?

- Hi. Is Napoleon there?

- Yes.

- Can I talk to him?

- You already are.

Oh.

Napoleon, this is Trisha.

I'm just calling

to tell you that...

I can go to the dance

with you.

- [Mouthing Words]

- And also...

I wanted to thank you

for the beautiful drawing you did of me.

- It's hanging in my bedroom.

- Really?

Took me, like, three hours

to finish the shading on your upper lip.

Rate this script:5.0 / 2 votes

Jared Hess

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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