My Friend Irma Goes West Page #3

Come on.

Horns up.

What are you doing?

I'm a wanderer on life's highway

Facing a world with a song and a smile

All right. You, out.

What are you trying to do here?

I'm leading a number. You're supposed...

- What are you doing to the band?

- What are you worried about the band for?

- You can use a quart.

- What are you doing to the band?

Why don't you sing your number?

Let me worry about the band.

They're under my jurisdiction.

I got the baton.

- Baton?

- The baton. Now let's laugh it up here.

Old man trouble keeps from my way

What are you doing here?

Why don't you... What are you doing?

Happiness travels with me all the while

You'll find life's long road is weary

- What are you doing?

- I'm singing.

You don't hear no noise

going on in the band now?

- I don't hear a thing.

- He's giving me aggravation.

He won't follow the stick.

I'll smack you right in the...

You don't think I'll do it, huh?

We're on television, Seymour.

Let's do this thing right.

I'm not one of that great legion

With their traveling care

And though I havert much religion

Here's my only prayer

I broke the arm, Steve, the whole arm,

the bone is busted.

The whole arm is...

Life is not

Life is not

Life is not just tinsel pleasure

That's so easy to find

But I can find

But I can find

In the middle, you'll find it...

But I can find life's greatest pleasures

In my peace of mind

Good boy.

Give me the road

Just a little louder. Here we go, fellas.

All right!

I'm not gonna stand here

and have you tolerate me.

Where did you get this band?

Don't yell at the band.

I'm leading the band.

I'm the conductor, but don't yell at them,

that's a union band.

I don't care about you or your union band.

See how mad they get?

You'd better say you're sorry.

- I will not.

- I'm warning you.

- No.

- Off the stand.

I'm sorry.

All right. There's just

one little mistake...

One little mistake?

Yeah, you're supposed to overlook it

when it happens.

- Overlook a mistake?

- Sure.

- Are you out of your mind?

- I'm as normal as you or anyone else.

Get off there.

No, they're not gonna take me back.

I have the grenades.

I've gotta mow them all down.

I say, may I report, sir? I'd like to try...

- Give me the note.

- All right.

There's one note missing.

Give him one note.

Big deal. Sing.

Give me the road

The wide winding highways

Just let me know the done beaten byways

And I'll travel along

singing a vagabond song

Well give me the flowers

The birds sing at morning

Just let me see that sunrise and dawning

And I'll travel along

singing a vagabond song

Happy you may be

with your fashions, your passions

Your smug little parts you play

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