Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous Page #7

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I made that show! It was my concept.

Then suddenly they change it and tell me

and Lou we're not up to their standards.

You work for me now.

- Lou.

- I'm there.

Bring me back up!

She's yours! She's all yours!

Let me up! Let me up.

Just let me up.

Oh, God, let me up.

Next time, he lets go.

You guys are crazy!

Now what?

Now we do exactly what he said.

We ransom her.

Please be careful.

My guns are in that Fendi.

Thank you. Thank you.

Please tell me you have tickets

to see Cirque du Soleil.

- I'm your bodyguard.

- What?

McDonald thinks we have a bond

because of our performance on Regis...

...and TRL, Oprah, the Food Network.

Oh, hey, hey, we got some great recipes

from that one. The lemon chicken? Tangy.

Now, look, like all great teams,

Hope and Crosby, Fred and Ginger...

...Outkast...

...the end must come...

...so bye-bye.

Let me make this simple for you, Hart.

McDonald gave me a mission...

...so that plane does not take off

unless we're both on it. Got it?

You might consider a Tic Tac.

Please...

...we're trying to cooperate.

- Shut your mouth.

- You can't talk to her like that.

- You trying to tell me what to do?

- No, I'm just the emcee.

I've heard you sing.

Lucky I don't shoot you now.

Okay, let's line this up.

- And...

- I don't have my crown.

- Who cares?

- I care.

- Fine.

- Thousands of women...

...all across America care.

- Give her the crown.

When in public, Miss United States

always proudly wears her crown.

Okay?

All right, let's go again.

One, two, action.

We've been kidnapped,

and there's two men here...

...who say they're gonna kill us

by Friday at midnight.

But I don't want anyone

to pay them any money.

- Cut!

- That would be giving in to terrorism...

...and I'm Miss United States...

- Cut!

... and I stand for fairness and decency...

...and the American way!

I said, cut!

I'd be happy to say it if you'd like.

I've done quite a bit of theater.

I played lago in Twelfth Night.

Put two more choppers up.

Sir.

- Gracie Hart.

- Yes.

- I'm Walter Collins.

- Sir.

I feel as though

I'm in the presence of royalty.

Oh, no, sir, I'm not queen,

just runner-up.

I would like to present to you

Agent Sam Fuller.

- Fuller.

- Sir.

- Joel Myers, Janine and Pam.

- Joel, Janine, Pam.

Why don't we get you to the hotel

while I give the agents a debriefing.

Oh, that's too bad. It's been months

since I've had a good debriefing.

Although, I'm really more

of a boxers man.

Okay, wrong audience.

Agent Hart, Agent Fuller,

this is Agent Foreman. He's your liaison.

- You need anything, Jeff is your boy.

- Good.

Welcome to Las Vegas

When my girlfriend found out that I would

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