Lenny Page #3

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who said that he knew her,

and he went to a party

with her, and... she, uh...

Lenny, look, I don't have

to spell it out for you, do I?

Did my mother

have anything to do with this?

Sally? No.

Look, Lenny, I'm not making this stuff up.

This isn't a very pleasant thing

to have to do, you know.

If you don't believe me,

check it out yourself.

I don't have to, man.

She already told me herself.

But, um, thanks.

I mean, I got involved in a lot of things

which I wish I didn't get involved in.

You know, very painful things

with, you know, his personal life.

Since you really cared for him.

Yeah, I loved that guy. I really did.

- Honey?

- Hm?

- Let's get married.

- What?

I was a June bride...

And I remember I was wearing

a bengaline suit, had on high heels.

Judge was Judge Liddy.

- You remember everything.

- Oh, yeah. A lot of it.

They've been sitting down there

like that for 15 minutes.

- Why doesn't she let him come up?

- Mema, give her a chance!

She's probably a lovely girl.

Oh, I knew all about her.

And I figured, it's his life, and if that's

who he loves, then that's fine with me.

But what can

they be talking about?

About us, dummy!

Oh, Jesus! There goes the hair.

My mother will be on all the time.

She probably won't

even know you're there.

Good, then I won't have to go up.

But you gotta meet Aunt Mema.

I'll get her to do her famous "Feh" for you.

"Feh"? What's that?

Her impression of a Jewish seagull.

"Feh! Feh!" You'll see.

- Come on, man, let's go.

- Lenny?

Do me a favour?

Please don't call me "man".

I really wanted her to like me.

In-laws, you know?

Oh, now, I gotta tell you

about the first time

that this schmuck ever worked a club.

Here it comes.

Never been on stage before. I'm

working this club on Ocean Parkway.

The Victory Club.

Ugh, what a joint.

The guys were so tough,

they wore wool suits in the summer.

With no underwear.

Listen, I know you know the story,

but I'm gonna tell it anyway.

- All right.

- One night the MC didn't show.

He had car trouble.

Police found marijuana in the trunk.

- Good.

- You haven't heard that before.

How long did you know Leonard

before you two got married?

- Um...

- You're on your own.

Mema... I'm on, OK?

So, I'm sitting in the bar.

And in walks Lenny.

You should have seen me. I had on

brown suede shoes, and the shirt...

So, I says "Lenny,

the MC didn't show tonight. "

"Now, how's about if I introduce you,

and you introduce the acts?"

And he says "Oh, no.

Are you kidding with that?"

And I says "There's nothing to it. '

"You don't have to be funny.

It's intros, like 'Here's Slip and Slap'."

"'How about a hand

for Schmutz and Dreck?"'

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