Lavalantula Page #3

what I saw.

You're not gonna believe

what's going on

on the freeway.

Where's Wyatt?

He left, remember?

When did he do that?

Of course you

don't remember. He--

You forgot to pick

him up for his game,

so he just walked

out of the house.

Honey, have you seen

the news?

Yes! You had a bar fight.

Call Wyatt,

and get him back here.

I have been

calling Wyatt,

but of course

he's not picking up.

You know what?

I'm just gonna go teach

my kickboxing class.

You're not

teaching anything.

You're not going anywhere.

Honey, it's not safe

out there.

I don't want you

going anywhere.

Stop it.

You're scaring me.

All right, I'm sorry!

What do you want from me?

I want you

to talk to me like

a normal human being.

Okay. Okay. Sweetheart,

did you feel

the earthquake?

Yes.

Good! Good!

I felt the earthquake.

It was an earthquake.

Right.

The fifth one this year.

It's not like it's

the end of the world.

Yes, it is, believe me.

The Santa Monica Mountains

erupted like a volcano.

I was on the freeway,

and I saw spiders

the size of men

raining on hoods

and spitting fire out

of their mouths.

Fire out of their mouths.

Have you

been drinking again?

No.

You know what?

That's it.

I'm calling

Dr. Hertzberg.

Honey, wait.

No, no, no. Stop it.

In the car now.

Honey, stop it.

I am not on anything.

I am completely sober.

I need you

to listen to me.

Sweetheart,

listen to me.

I love you, okay?

I need you to pack

everything that's

important to us.

I want you to take the dog,

I want you take

your jewelry,

and I want you

to pack everything up,

and you have to listen to me,

and we have to leave here.

Colton,

we don't have a dog.

Colton! Colton!

Whoa, whoa. Wait, wait.

What is that for?

I'm going to get Wyatt.

Honey, did you call him or not?

Okay, okay.

I was standing here,

talking to you.

He said he was

going to Travis'.

Oh, damn. Then he's probably

downtown riding bikes.

Look, just stay

in the house.

If he comes back,

you keep him here.

You got it?

Circuits are busy.

Well, just keep trying.

And tell everybody

to stay off the freeway.

All right, get this.

Get this.

Here he goes.

Here he goes.

Whoo!

Ah, wicked, man!

Hey, dawg. I didn't

know you were coming.

Glad you could

make it out.

Hey, Jordan.

Sick move, man.

Thanks.

Yeah.

Should have been here

five minutes ago.

Yeah. You should've seen.

My girl was sick.

So are you

riding with us today?

Yeah, for sure, if it's

cool with you guys.

Of course.

Hell, yeah.

Oh, right on. Let's go.

Don't even think

about it.

I've been trying forever

to get her out here.

What did I do?

Gave her a flirty smile.

I did?

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