Last Action Hero Page #4

- Oiler, you're partnered up with Waterman.

- Give me a partner, Sarge.

That is right.

Yep. Of course. No, just as you say.

Yep.

Krause, you're teamed up with the rabbi.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- How do you get to Carnegie Hall?

- Practice!

John Practice, you old SOB.

What are you doing away from Washington?

The bureau thinks something strange

is going on between...

And this is top secret...

I know. The Vivaldi mob is joining forces

with the Torellis.

Damn it, Jack, how do you do that?

Well, I'm not parked behind a desk all day

eating those donuts.

Those are government donuts, my friend.

It's not easy work. I got to call DC.

Good for you.

Watch it, Jack. He killed Mozart.

- In a movie?

- Amadeus. It won eight Oscars.

I saved his life in Nam.

I'll make sure to be on the lookout. Thanks.

Now, no more movies!

Slater!

I got the city council chewing my eggs off

for that plane you crashed!

I got the mayor scheduling parades,

up my Lincoln tunnel

for that stunt you pulled on the beach!

Everybody wants to know,

what it is, what it ain't and what it will be!

- Do I make myself clear?

- I'm just doing my job.

You've given this department

the worst reputation in the country.

Now I've got the Chamber of Commerce

doing cartwheels in my cocoa factory.

Radcliff, you're pulling duty

with the animated cat.

Hiya, toots.

- I'm getting a flea bath later. Join me?

- You touch me again, fur ball...

- Wait! I can prove this is a movie.

- Who the hell are you, kid?

Look out there, there's a cartoon cat.

He's supposed to be back on duty.

He was only suspended for a month.

Now, shut up.

Listen to what I'm saying.

An animated cat just walked

into the squad room. Hello.

He'll do it again tomorrow.

So what's your point?

- That cat is one of the best men I got!

- Yeah.

Now who is this twerp?

And why is that smile on his face?

I just love the way you two fight,

knowing how you really feel

about each other.

Pray tell, just how do I feel about

this weird-looking sack of puppy poop?

You're dearest friends.

After your wife left you for the circus midget

and Jack told everyone he drove her to

New England to the diphtheria clinic.

When he came back, you said,

"You saved me from public humiliation,

Jack.

"You're my dearest friend."

- And you promised me you wouldn't tell.

- I didn't.

- Then how did he know?

- Jack Slater I.

- What's winning got to do with this?

- No! The very first Jack Slater.

You told your dad?

I didn't tell anyone.

I don't even know this kid.

Well, he seems to know a lot about us.

No such number. No such name.

The state of New York's never heard of you,

Mr. Madigan.

- What's your real name?

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