Katt Williams Live Page #5

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it could change your life.

Some of you all be crying

about bills you can't pay.

Got your kids lying,

"My daddy say he ain't home. "

Some of you all

just be in the living room, just...

"I don't know what I'm gonna do

about this light bill.

"They want the whole thing.

They don't want a piece of it, a deposit. "

Just hit the block one time

and see if it don't change your perception

of what's important in your life.

You just... "I don't know

what I'm gonna do about this light. I just... "

"F*** them goddamn lights.

"I got 12 candles.

I've been waiting to burn them b*tches up. "

'Cause that don't make no sense,

for them to tell us that should be illegal.

Aspirin is perfectly legal,

but if you take 13 of them motherfuckers,

it'll be your last headache.

As long as you been living,

you ain't never heard

of nobody overdose on marijuana.

You might have thought

that nigga was dead. He ain't dead.

He gonna wake up in 30 minutes

hungry enough to eat up

everything in your house.

That's the side effects.

Hungry, happy, sleepy. That's it.

I don't know.

What I don't know

is why they ain't made weed into a pill.

They can clone sheep.

They can make a baby without the mama.

Remember the cell phone?

When that motherf***er came out,

was it not this goddamn big?

Came in a suitcase with a shoulder strap.

Now the cell phone is so small

that by next year

it's just gonna be

a chip on a nigga's tongue.

You just gonna be smoking

a cigarette, yeah...

"Hello?

"No, nigga, I got you on the tongue phone.

"Hold on. I got another call.

"Hello?"

You gotta be careful, though.

Got to be careful.

You have to pay attention to your schedule.

I had to have a meeting

with all the weed salesmen in Cincinnati

and explain to these niggas

that I need regular weed.

I have sh*t to do. I have an agenda.

I don't want sh*t with a nickname.

Not Thriller, Killer, Salmonella,

none of that sh*t.

I want it to say, right on the bag,

"Regular Weed".

Regular weed, you get the munchies,

and you can live your life.

This nigga in Cincinnati two days ago

sold me some sh*t

had me looking

at the refrigerator for four hours.

I'm just in the kitchen on the stove, just...

"I bet you, ain't sh*t in there.

I bet you, there's sh*t in... "

You know the weed is too good

when you hit it and look at it. Just...

"Ah, nigga, there's something in here.

There's something in here. That... "

Something...

You just...

You just gotta do everything in moderation.

'Cause I thought

that all weed smokers were created equal,

but that's not the case, not the case at all.

I live in Los Angeles now,

and I was hanging out with Snoop Dogg.

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