In the Weeds Page #3

Oh, thank you.

Now you only owe me two packs.

Did you tell Adam about

our session in the locker room?

"C" cup.

Who'd have thunk it?

Actor.

Did she just insult me?

I think she did.

You.

Marvin.

Raise your arms.

What?

Raise your arms.

Next time use a razor.

Did you see that?

That fascist son of a b*tch.

I could sue

for that humiliation.

I never win stuff like that.

It's a dollar.

What can you lose?

A Mexican busboy buys

Lotto ticket for entire staff,

and they win!

They buy the restaurant,

fire everyone.

Can't you see it on 11:00 news?

A dollar.

Dollar.

Not a problem.

Not for you.

Bye-bye.

Excuse me, Jonathan.

Did you maybe find out

about the raise?

Were it up to me, Hector,

you know I would.

I'm sorry.

Talk to Simon.

If you dare.

I thought you quit.

Made myself a deal.

Every day I don't call Alice,

I get to keep smoking.

That's a healthy incentive.

What the hell is that?

It's Rogaine.

But you're not losing your hair.

Yeah, I'm not taking

any chances.

Did you check your machine?

Nothing.

I'm going crazy, man.

I haven't booked a job

since my agent signed me.

The clock is ticking.

You'll get something.

I can't do this sh*t

much longer.

You think I don't know that?

I don't think

that Ibsen was serving meat loaf

when he was my age.

Mamet wrote "American Buffalo"

when he was 28.

Dickens wrote "Oliver Twist"

when he was 26.

What the hell have I done?

Yeah, but you're a writer.

You can grow old,

lose your hair, be seasoned.

That's a plus in your field.

I'm not gonna be this

devastatingly handsome forever.

I got an expiration date

on my face.

There are parts

other than leading man.

Look at this face.

It's got "leading man"

written all over it.

Excuse me, sir.

Can I speak to you?

Is it important?

It is to me.

The runners

were wondering about -

No.

But we don't even get

minimum wage, sir.

You're an illegal immigrant,

amigo,

You're lucky you have a job.

I have a family to support.

So do I.

Welcome to America.

You might want to

unbutton those.

Tits help tips.

Hey, hey!

I left mine at home.

I'll bring it right back.

You better bring it right back.

Jack, she's new.

She's nice.

She's married.

Anytime, ladies.

Why did you say I was married?

He's a dog.

He'll hit on anything.

Chief, my wife's due any day.

Hook me with a good station.

I need the cash.

All my stations are good, chief.

The deuces?

Come on!

What's wrong with the deuces?

Other than the fact

that they suck?

How about that big party

in section four?

I'll sell

all that crappy pinot noir,

That's Stan's table.

Cut you a slice.

5 /..

- Chris, I'm shocked.

Shocked you'd think I'd settle

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes