Identity Thief Page #3

But if you want to be

a part of building something,

if you want to be a part of

changing this awful business,

stand up now and join us.

That's wonderful, everybody.

Isn't that inspiring?

A start-up.

Please, I invite you,

anybody who wants to join this fellow,

I'm considering it myself.

But if you do join these traitors,

you will live to regret it.

Because this firm has offices

in 20 cities in three continents,

and you do not want us as an enemy.

Last chance. Who's with us?

- I am.

- Who said that?

I did.

Sandy. Anybody else want to join him?

All he's got are threats, people.

And all they have is Sandy.

You better pray this works.

You better pray this works, Sandy.

You better pray this works,

because I'm coming for you.

And I'm killing you everywhere.

Don't come crawling back!

What?

Oh! Boy, that's nice.

That looks good, that looks good.

I lost my wedding ring. Shh!

Fifteen years of marriage.

Can you believe that?

- May I see your ID?

- Mmm-hmm.

Yes, you can.

Sandy Bigelow Patterson.

We just got married back in St. Paul.

Yeah. Howard's a surgeon.

So, he fixes smiles.

Yeah, he's kind of the big guy for teeth.

My friends took me out for my birthday.

They made a big deal out of me turning 30.

I was like, "Thirty, what? No way."

I mean, I hit it pretty

hard in my twenties, so...

Do you like to hit it hard?

I bet you do. I bet you can hit that

so hard.

There we go, okay.

Let's get them off it.

Ma'am? Ma'am.

What the f***?

Ma'am, your card was declined.

Oh, yeah.

Here, use this one.

That one's done.

Great.

Hi. Good morning.

Something wrong with pump five.

It's not taking my card.

Thanks.

You don't pay your bills, man.

I gotta cut the card.

"Cut the card."

No, I absolutely pay my bills.

Run it one more time.

Nothing wrong with that card.

That's not what it says right here.

I don't care what the screen says.

Maybe it's broken.

I'll go somewhere else.

You're not cutting that card.

Cutting the card? That's ridiculous.

Tell you what, I'll go somewhere else.

You go somewhere else?

Look, that's my papi.

He owns this store.

- He says cut the card.

- Senior.

- If you don't pay your bills...

- My bills are paid.

Oh, your bills are paid.

I gotta cut the card.

Do not cut that card.

I'm gonna cut the card. I just cut the card.

- Go pay your bills, Randy.

- It's Sandy.

Sandy?

How's my credit exceeded?

Well, Mr. Patterson,

your balance is $12,243.67.

That's absurd.

I use the card for gas and for coffee.

I'm showing $4,345

from Great Beyond Water Sports.

Well, I'll stop you there,

because I've never heard of that place.

"Great Beyond Water Sports"?

Nope, I've never been there.

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