Heathers Page #6

That would be Heather McNamara.

Damn. I'd be willing to go half a day

for a cheerleader.

God, it's unfair. It's just so unfair.

We should get off a whole week,

not just an hour.

Write the school board.

Watch it, you might be digesting food.

- Yeah, where is your urge to purge?

- F*** it.

Look...

Heather left behind one of her Swatches.

She'd want you to have it, Veronica.

She always said

you couldn't accessorise for sh*t.

Sorry to hear about your friend.

I thought she was your usual airhead b*tch.

Guess I was wrong.

We all were.

What a waste.

Oh, the humanity.

Veronica?

Veronica, what are you doing?

I'm just so thrilled...

to finally have an example

of the profound sensitivity of

which a human animal is capable.

That example is Heather Chandler.

I have her note.

Whoo!

I'm gonna pass this note around the class

so you can all feel

its pathetic beauty for yourself.

And while we do this,

I think it's a good opportunity to share...

the feelings that this suicide

has spurred in all of us.

Now, who would like to begin?

I heard it was really gnarly.

She sucked down a bowl of

multi-purpose deodorising disinfectant

and then smash!

Tracy, let's not rehash the coroner's report,

let's talk emotions.

Um, Heather and I used to go out

but she said I was boring.

But now I realise I really wasn't boring...

it's just that she was

dissatisfied with her life.

That's... very good, Peter.

Are we going to be tested on this?

'We were the same size

'so we could borrow

each other's clothes, mix it up. It was fun.'

"I remember I won her

a rhino at the 4-H Club... '

You're an a**hole. Mute him.

- 'We liked the same clothes... '

- How many networks did you run to?

'It won't be the same without her.'

What are you talking about?

You hated her. She hated you.

'Every English class

I looked forward to seeing her... '

Heather Chandler

is more popular than ever now.

- Scary stuff.

- Yeah.

Hey, son, I didn't hear you come in.

Hey, Dad, how was work today?

It was miserable.

Some damn tribe of withered old b*tches

doesn't want us to terminate

that fleabag hotel.

All because Glen Miller and his band

once took a sh*t there.

Just like Kansas.

You remember f***ing Kansas?

That was the one with the wheat, right?

Yeah. Save the Memorial Oak Tree Society.

Showed those fucks.

30 of those 4th of July fireworks

attached to the trunk.

Arraigned but acquitted.

Gosh, Pop,

I almost forgot to introduce my girlfriend.

Oh. Veronica, this is my dad.

Dad, Veronica.

Hi.

Son, why don't you ask

your little friend to stay for dinner?

I can't. My mom's making

my favourite meal tonight -

spaghetti, lots of oregano.

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