Gangsta Granny Page #6

Synopsis: Whilst his parents Linda and Mike spend every weekend ballroom dancing 11 year old Ben goes to stay with his granny, whom he initially finds boring. Then one day he finds a huge collection of jewels in a biscuit tin and discovers she was once a notorious burglar, the Black Cat, though she was never caught as she never tried to sell her spoils. Ben decides they should pull off the biggest heist of all, stealing the Crown Jewels from the Tower of London, using his intimate knowledge of plumbing to enter. Despite his parents' disastrous attempt to get him on the dance floor and the intrusive Neighbourhood Watch warden Parker the couple effect their daring plan. They do not succeed but are allowed to escape by a Royal personage, whom they happen to meet. Sadly Granny does not make it to Christmas but her legacy lives on - in the millions raised for charity by her jewels and the profound effect she has had on the Royal personage.
 
IMDB:
5.8
Year:
2013
60 min
1,999 Views


Don't worry.

I'll meet you in the car park.

I'm sorry.

We just spotted it too late.

Oh.

You OK, Granny?

Yes. Yes, I'm fine, thank you.

Good, because I've worked out a way

to steal the Crown Jewels.

Oh, Ben.

It's all about the plumbing.

You see, the tower

has a 500-year-old sewer

running underneath it

and that's our way in.

You're forgetting the place

is teeming with Beefeaters.

I've memorised and timed

all their patrol routes.

And how do

we get into the jewel house?

Drill the locks off the doors?

The Crown Jewels are kept

behind bulletproof glass.

Uncle Derrick. He got me this

chemistry set from the market,

and it has this metal

that blows up when it touches water.

Well, seems like you've thought

the whole thing out.

Well?

Oh, you're not serious?

One last job for the Black Cat.

One last job. Oh.

So, what do you think?

I'm in. Yes!

Ben, there's one small problem.

What? I'm not meant to leave here.

Excuse me.

Mrs Norris.

Mrs Norris!

Hey, there!

Mrs Norris!

You're not a doctor.

I am.

Yes. Yes.

He's got YFS.

What?

Young Face Syndrome.

It's what inspired him

to go into medicine.

I'm 52.

Doors opening.

They discharged me.

Drive!

So, Granny, do you need a couple

of days to get your strength back?

No. No, it has to be sooner.

'Let's do it on Friday.'

'Just think, this time next week

the Crown Jewels will be ours.'

'One last job for the Black Cat.'

'Yeah.'

Oh, you silver-maned menace.

I have you now.

It's Friday night.

You ready, son?

Yeah. You don't have

to pick me up too early tomorrow.

Me and Gran will be playing

Scrabble way into the night.

You're not going

to Granny's tonight.

No?

No.

Oh, he's pretending he's forgotten.

It's the ballroom championships.

Oh.

("Et C'est La Rencontre"

by Frederic Clement plays)

Let's hope Ben

doesn't let my princess down.

As if my little prince would.

Your boy hasn't turned up

to any rehearsals.

He used telephony.

Anything less than straight tens

would be a disappointment.

Anything less than straight tens

would be a disappointment.

Yeah, I said that.

Please welcome

your host for this evening,

the star of Strictly.

And he was once a guest

on Saturday Kitchen.

Go wild...

for Flavio Flavioli!

Good evening...

Basildon.

Are you ready to rumba?

No, no, no.

Flavio. He no hear you. I say,

are you ready to rumba?

I don't want to hurt you, Flavio.

I just want to love you.

Ben, we haven't practised once.

I need to ask you a question

and I promise I won't be angry

with you if you answer me honestly.

Have you ever danced before?

Erm...

No.

I hate you.

I hate you.

I hate you!

Superbio.

Please welcome our next

Rate this script:3.0 / 8 votes

David Walliams

David Edward Williams (born 20 August 1971), known professionally as David Walliams, is an English comedian, actor, author, and presenter known for his partnership with Matt Lucas on the BBC One sketch show Little Britain. Since 2012, Walliams has been a judge on the ITV talent show Britain's Got Talent. He wrote and starred in two series of the BBC One sitcom Big School, playing the role of chemistry teacher Keith Church. In 2015, he starred as Tommy Beresford in the BBC series Partners in Crime based on the Tommy and Tuppence novels by Agatha Christie. Walliams is also a writer of children's books. He has sold more than 25 million copies and his books have been translated into 53 languages. He has been described as "the fastest growing children's author in the UK" and his literary style has been compared to that of Roald Dahl. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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