Fred 2: Night of the Living Fred Page #8

Okay.

Now entering the arena,

the reigning Tag Team Champions,

Fred Figglehorn

and his father, Dad Figglehorn!

Let's go!

Now, the champs must face

their deadliest opponents yet,

the masked vampire,

Mr. Devlin!

And his undead partner, Kevin!

- Oh, my gammit!

- They're vampires, Son.

In the words of Vince McMahon,

"Expect the unexpected."

Oh, my gammit!

No human is a match

for the strength of the undead.

- Except a WWE Superstar.

- I was going to say that.

If you'd let me finish, that was going to be

the end of my sentence.

I'm sorry, I cut you off.

- You're what?

- I'm sorry.

Well, you don't sound like you mean it,

so apology not accepted!

Figglehorn!

Please don't bite my neck!

- I'm not gonna bite you!

- You aren't?

No, that's disgusting!

The other vampires

would think we're dating.

I just thought

you wanted to turn me undead.

No, someone else could do it.

I just want you dead!

Well, that's a relief!

Good job, Son.

Thanks. Look out behind you.

Two, three, four, five, six,

seven, eight, nine, ten!

What? Well, I better get to bed.

I have school tomorrow.

I'm more convinced than ever

that he's a vampire!

- Come on, Fred.

- Did you hear him?

He said he was going to

suck the life out of those kids.

Yeah, I heard him,

but I'm sure he meant something else.

Hey, Fred.

I'm gonna need some of your blood.

You too, Bertha.

I stand corrected.

What makes you think

we'd give you any of our blood, Mr. Devlin?

For the blood drive.

I'm gonna get a pint of blood

from each of the kids.

- Kevin gave a pint this morning.

- Yup and I feel great.

Well, you look terrible.

Yeah? Well, I look better than you!

I highly doubt that, stupid!

You know, it's a great thing

that Kevin's done.

He's given the gift of life

to someone who needs it.

Kind of like a vampire, if you ask me.

- Well, vampires need to live, too, Fred.

- No, they don't,

- they're dead already.

- That's where you're wrong, Fred.

Vampires are undead.

Well, enough joking around,

I have to get going.

I'll see you guys later

when I take your blood.

Bertha, I met your mother last night.

She is a wonderful, wonderful waitress.

Maybe next time, you give her a better tip.

The recital is tonight,

and everyone's gonna be there.

- I know, isn't it exciting?

- It's scary, is what it is.

I know, I know,

totally scary in an exciting way.

Hey, I wanna show you something.

I made these hand puppets.

Hi, Fred. I'm Talia.

Hi, Talia. I'm Fred.

I like you, Fred.

I'm not sure I'm ready to say

how I feel about you yet, Talia.

That's okay, even though

I already opened myself up to you.

That's nice.

Talia, hurry up! Mr. Devlin is waiting!

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