Failure to Launch Page #5

It's a mockingbird.

Who did what?

It's a mockingbird.

What is?

You don't hear that?

That annoying noise.

Oh, yeah, now I hear it.

I looked it up.

They can imitate car alarms,

and telephones, and other birds.

I called Animal Control,

and you know what they said?

They said I should just enjoy

one of nature's most talented singers.

- Yeah.

- I'm gonna kill it.

Okay, I'm all set.

- Oh, wow.

- Hi.

Wow, look at you.

Well, look at you.

Sweet shoes.

Really? Thanks.

Okay, well, Kit, we're gonna go.

See you.

- You ready?

- Yeah.

Okay, you two kids have a blast.

- Thanks.

- Hey, Kit, good luck with the...

It's a chipmunk bite.

I figured.

Obviously not a normal chipmunk.

You're right about that.

No, this was like a big, oversized, like,

bobcat, grizzly-bear chipmunk.

I'm pretty fortunate to still be here.

- Wow.

- Yeah.

What did the doctor say?

I didn't need to see a doctor.

I had some cream at home

that I put on it.

- You had chipmunk cream?

- Yeah.

- Wow, that's lucky.

- Isn't it?

I take it you like Japanese food.

Oh, I love it.

I'm also gonna order a huge dessert,

drink too much,

and maybe talk about my old boyfriends.

- Yeah?

- Does that intimidate you?

Not at all.

Cheers, Paula.

Cheers.

All right, T-R-l-double-P going in

to get a little squid.

Do you need me to help you with that?

I got it. I got it. Look at this, look at this.

I admire the confidence.

Thank you. I am fairly...

ambidextrous.

Oh, sh*t.

I'm sorry! Excuse me.

Squid's a little bit greasy tonight.

Sorry. Yeah.

That's not easy to do.

I didn't see anything.

Tell me about yourself.

What do you do for a living?

I teach special needs kids.

- How's the hand?

- It's fine.

- Is it throbbing?

- No.

Is the medication wearing off?

Gotta scratch.

Oh, yeah.

Well,

home again.

Home again.

I had a nice time.

I did, too.

Good.

I had fun.

Good.

Shut up!

Shut up you crazy bastard bird b*tch!

Hey, Kit!

What? Hi.

Can you guys see me?

- Yeah!

- Yeah.

Oh. Great.

What?

Dinner and a show.

Good night.

Good night.

Now, what type of a boat

do you see yourself in?

Well, I'm not sure.

But I do know that I need

to be out in the open sea.

Well, you gotta ask yourself

some questions.

Do you like speed?

Do you like to hear

the roar of an engine?

Do you want to get from point A

to point B as quickly as possible?

If that turns you on,

then you want a powerboat.

Okay, that's it. That's it.

Power. That's me. Yes.

Well, that's one way to go.

But maybe you want to slow down.

You know, listen to the wind

and the water.

Have sunrise and sunset

as your only clock.

Know that you could go

around the world

on less than a tank of gas.

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