Cat Run Page #3

And you need to live your life.

So, you in on this, man?

You going to get with me?

Come on, man, be a dick.

All right.

If it doesn't work,

you're waiting tables.

- We're gonna do this?

- I'm with you.

- We can! Yes, we can!

- We'll try.

Come on, you feel me!

My boy! Bros before hos.

- I don't have any hos.

- That's on my list.

You gonna get some hos.

It's, er, wait.

"Bonjour". It's right here.

Come on, here we go.

This is it.

Oh, yes!

Yes! Dude, that's Santa Claus.

They're showing

Christmas movies.

A porno theatre.

Our office is in a porno theatre.

Dude, you think Ben and Jerry

started in a high rise creamery?

No, not at all. They had

one big spoon, one bucket,

in the back of a VW van,

creaming in their pants.

Ground up, Anthony, ground up.

Hey, you wanna watch the movie,

you need to buy a ticket.

Er, let's see.

We're looking for a... Boden.

Ah, Boda? It's me.

Come on, guys, come on.

This is your office.

You make here much money.

You have all you need here.

Big desk, free porno.

Careful, careful. Boards rotten.

Here, you can put the papers.

And this is very important place.

You can wash here or piss here.

Everybody must piss, yes.

500 of month, but, er,

for you, because I like your face,

I give to you for four, OK?

We'll take it.

Good guys.

- Yes.

- Come on, pay him.

- Er, yes, come on.

- You ready to wait tables?

Ground up, ground up.

- You make here big success.

- Ah.

- Enjoy.

- Thank you.

So we have

an uninhabitable hovel

overlooking

a Santa Claus snuff film.

What's next?

Staff.

You know,

I was in Army language school.

I speak five different languages.

- Um, do you mind if we ask, Mr...

- Call me Dexter.

OK, er, Dexter, um, how did you?

Well, I mean,

were you born like this?

- He was in the Army.

- Oh. Oh, no.

Shortly after I was discharged,

my wife and I

were vacationing in Florida,

and we were involved

in a shark attack.

Um, so that's how you lost?

- Oh, no, shark ate my wife.

- Oh, God.

Have you ever seen somebody

you love eaten alive slowly,

one bite at a time?

Er, he didn't eat her whole?

Oh, they found her hole. And

a piece of her ass on the beach.

Just an empty thong

and a broken dream.

You know,

that hits you kinda hard.

I started drinking

and using intravenous drugs.

Lost my arm through

an abscess caused by a dirty needle.

I reached rock bottom

about five years ago.

I was living on the streets

and begging and eating pet food.

Finally, I just threw myself

under a subway train,

and landed on the rails,

and well, that train just, whoosh!

Popped my legs clean off.

Well, listen,

you seem remarkably positive.

I thank God every day

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