Carry on Doctor Page #2

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More like a hamster.

Oh!

Have you been smoking, Mr Roper?

And so a great hospital

swings into action.

Its doctors, nurses and orderlies

working round the clock,

calmly, coolly and efficiently

to relieve the suffering of others.

Dedicated,

and apparently without any emotions.

But as any television viewer knows,

appearances can be deceptive.

Yes, as in all hospitals,

there is high drama beneath the placid surface.

As in all humans,

a thousand passions and loves

surge and tremble

beneath the bed gowns,

the white jackets, and the starched bosoms.

Oh dear, I must

try and control my feelings when I see him.

Please, please don't let me blush.

I can't think of anything

more perfect than the night, and you.

And me.

God, but you look absolutely stunning tonight.

Breathlessly beautiful.

I've never seen such a lovely...

Not bad.

Not bad at all.

Now, what do I say?

Ah, yes.

I don't know what it is,

but, somehow,

you're completely different to all other girls.

May I?

May I take your coat?

Oh, what a beautiful neck!

Quite irresistible.

Forgive me. I just had to do that.

Doctor?

Please, darling, just call me Jim.

Dr Kilmore?

Oh... Oh, oh, Nurse Clarke.

Excuse me,

but there's a casualty in Fosdick.

Oh, good!

There. Doctor will be here in a moment.

I should hope so.

For all he knows,

I might be lying here with my life ebbing away!

Well, it can happen, you know.

You never can tell.

One moment you're here, the next... phut!

I think he's phutted already.

What've they got you in here for?

Something nasty?

No, not really. Just a pain in the back.

Last bloke in that bed had the same thing.

Did he?

Right up to the end.

Oh, that's cheering.

I'll say one thing for them - it's a nice warm bed.

Should be.

They only took him out half an hour ago.

This must be where they keep the coal.

Oh... How do you do?

I didn't know you were still with us.

Yes, well...

don't let me keep you conscious.

Is this your first?

Pardon?

Is this your first?

First? First what?

Baby.

Huh?

It's the first time for me.

Never again, though.

Never aga...

Is he really going to have a?

No, his wife is.

Trouble was, when she told him, he collapsed,

and he's been here ever since.

Don't let them tell you having one is easy.

I'm having a terrible time!

Terrib...

He should be in the paternity ward.

This is a madhouse!

You'll get used to it.

You're lucky Kilmore's looking after you.

He's all right, he is.

Yeah, but wait till old Tinkle comes round. Cor!

Tinkle?

He's the registrar. That means senior doctor.

And he's a first-class B.

Knows his job, though.

Yeah, so does the hangman.

Oh! Oh, I say, I'm terribly sorry, Matron.

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