Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star Page #4

I hope he's still awake.

It is kind of late.

Hey, Gary, I'm sorry to bother you.

I wanted to see

if you have that room for rent.

So are we gonna do this or not?

Yeah. Yeah.

Well, you can tell him

that Gary said to eat my sh*t.

Yeah, totally.

You wanna move your stuff

in tonight?

No. No, it's not for me.

It's for my friend Bucky here.

I'm still up In 44.

How are you doing? Bucky Larson.

What line of work are you in?

I'm here to be a movie star.

My last roommate came here to be a

rock star then skipped town, that f***.

Owes me three months rent.

F*** you, John Mayer.

Wait, no. I got the dough.

I'm good for it.

- Can you excuse us for a minute?

- Yeah, sure.

And don't leave.

I'd like to say goodbye.

Okay.

Look, I don't know you

and I don't know Kathy.

I've seen her in the laundry room

a few times...

...but that doesn't mean I trust her.

I trust her tits.

Okay.

I'm gonna let you have the room

because I know you got cash.

And I know I could pound

those woodcutters down your throat.

Why are you being weird

about that?

- I'm not. It's fine. Whatever you want.

- Yeah, no f***ing sh*t.

You can have the bathroom

off the hallway.

Don't use the one in my room.

That's my private sanctuary.

- Roommates?

- Yeah, roommates.

- Good.

- Great seeing you again, Kathy...

...and if you ever wanna hang out

by the pool, let me know.

Okay.

- Good night, Bucky.

- Good night, Kathy.

All right.

I could do this all day, bird...

...but I gotta go and take this town

by the antlers.

What the f***?

- I'm sorry.

- Shut the door!

You said this was my bathroom.

It is! But I sh*t here!

I can't sh*t where I shower!

Shut the f***ing door!

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

You better not be a psycho!

Sorry. We got a new intern

out here at our office.

Bucky.

Why are you brushing your teeth

in the pool?

There's a problem

with my bathroom.

There's gonna be a problem

in your stomach...

...if you keep using that water.

- Thanks for the warning.

- Yeah.

I'm off to work.

Good luck being nude today.

Okay. Say hi to Chewbacca.

Okay.

Free snake? No, thanks.

"Actors wanted.

Open call audition."

Bucky Larson.

This is Bucky Larson.

Do you have a headshot?

Like a shot of my head or what?

Yeah.

Yeah, wait.

I got a picture here of me.

That's me on the left. You can just

fold it and get the head part.

Your accent's awesome, man.

I like the Midwest choice.

And that vest is amazing.

Oh, thanks.

My mom made it for me.

This isn't a proper headshot.

Who cares?

Come on, this guy's great.

Don't be such a buzz-kill.

Are you familiar with Redondi

Mac and Cheese?

Oh, Yeah. That's my favorite.

My mom makes it every Tuesday

Rate this script:3.5 / 2 votes