As Cool as I Am Page #6

Why don't you guys come

over here for brunch?

Are you sure? That's

kind of you, but...

Yeah! Lucy always makes

a mountain of food,

and they're like brother and

sister already, so...

- you know, we're already like family.

- Okay!

- 11 o'clock on Sunday?

- All right.

Fantastic! All right, I'll see you then.

We're gonna have Easter brunch on

Sunday together. How great is that?

Did you know that I used to

babysit your mom?

Of course she does.

Remember I told you

about the babysitter

- who puked in our jack o'lantern?

- Oh, I'd forgotten all about that!

- And weren't you the one... didn't you...

- What?

give Lainee's cousin the

teething toy

that you found in her mother's

underwear drawer?

I was 14. I had no idea

why the women were

so upset and the men couldn't

stop laughing.

It was a vibrator.

Yeah, I got there on my own.

Thank you.

So then Lucy, winds up

having to kiss this

shitdiculous kid Scott

something, Scott...

Booker.

Scott Booker.

Scott Booker. Scott

McSmell-ass Booker. Yes!

Apparently to save Kenny

from getting a beating.

See, that's completely unfair.

Hey, uh, let's do that thing where

we all go round

and say what we're thankful for.

- I don't understand, what's unfair?

- That's Thanksgiving...

Teenage boys have feelings too.

Did it occur to you that

Scott or Kenny might have been

embarrassed or upset by what happened?

I'll start! Uh, I am thankful

to live in a country...

I can tell you all about teenage boys

and their penis-centric feelings.

...nonfiction novel and

- reality television.

- Ooh, that's such a

stupid over-generalization.

I am thankful for the Molto Italiano

cookbook which I got directions...

It's just as hard to be

a teenage boy as it is

to be a teenage girl.

Isn't that right, Kenny?

As a former pregnant teenager,

I have to say it's way tougher being the girl.

Lainee, I know you were

lost in your grief

and your anger when your parents died.

And... and even Chuck dropped

out of high school.

Everyone said he'd a chance

at playing college ball.

I don't want Kenny to have to give up

his life like Chuck did.

Kenny has just as much at risk in a

sexual relationship as Lucy does.

What the effing sh*t?

I think the issue isn't so much

who has a more difficult time,

I think it's challenging for

all adolescents...

- Lainee, you didn't know?

- All right...

I don't need you to tell me what

you think my daughter is doing...

Nothing is being taught

in the schools...

And I don't have to

standby and pretend

that there's nothing I can

do about it.

The real issue is how do we

hold society more accountable?

That's enough!

Are you making accusations

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