Amazon Women on the Moon Page #3

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- You lost our son?

- Did I say lost? I said misplaced!

I'm suing you for-- for malpractice,

negligence-- you name it!

Just jump all over me! What about

the nine kids I didn't lose this week?

My baby! What have they

done with my baby?

It was your fault. If you hadn't

distracted me with that video equipment

in the delivery room...

I might not have misplaced

your little brat!

- Doctor. We found him.

- See?

- He was down the hall

in the laundry hamper.

- [ Both ] Oh!

Oh, he's beautiful.

I hope you're both

ashamed of yourselves.

All this hysteria when he was safe

and sound not 20 feet from this room.

Doctor, you're due in surgery

for that kidney transplant.

Where's the donor organ?

The donor organ?

God, I had it with me

when I left the house this morning.

[ Man ] Good morning and welcome

to Movies Till Sunrise.

Our feature presentation

is the 1 954 science fiction classic...

Amazon Women on the Moon...

starring Laird Granger

and Greta Van Zandt...

complete and uncut, with no

commercial interruptions.

This used to be me.

Old before my years,

ignored by women...

passed over for promotions.

But now all that has changed.

Hi. I'm Sy Swerdlow...

and I invented the patented process

known as ''hair looming.''

If you suffer from premature hair loss,

let our team of technicians...

visit you in the privacy

of your home...

so there will be

no embarrassment.

You choose from our selection...

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Then your head

will be carpeted...

- with 1 00% pure acrylic fibre,

- [ Whirring ]

- completely natural-looking.

- [ Tacking ]

You can sleep in it.

You can shower in it.

[ Vacuuming ]

It changed my life...

and it'll change yours.

Call toll free--

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[ Radio Static ]

- Well, men, I've been studying

this map of the lunar surface...

- [ Monkey Chattering ]

and I've chosen the dark side

as our landing site.

- So, don't forget your space beams.

- Roger, Steve.

Just think, Loony, in less than an hour,

we're gonna be on the moon.

The first thing I'm gonna do

is carve me off a hunk of that green cheese.

Now, Butch, you know one of

the purposes of this mission...

is to dispel

some of those myths.

Steve, I've got the president

on the electro-scan.

- Whillikers!

- [ Beep ]

[ Man ]

Come in, men of Moon Rocket One.

This is the president of the United States

calling from planet Earth.

We read you, Mr President.

This is Steve Nelson,

commander, Moon Rocket One.

Commander Nelson,

this is a proud day for all Americans...

and this year of 1 980

will be remembered as the year...

an American

first set foot on the moon.

The governors

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