Adult Life Skills Page #6

move back here permanently.

Well you 'ave.

Not permanently.

Only while I write my book.

Wot's that about again?

Changed it now, it's about 'is...

- ...ballet dancer who comes back from...

- That you?

Nn...

Have you actually looked 'round?

Yeah.

It made me want to slit my forehead

and bleed all over the floor.

Honestly.

It's like a contraceptive

made of chipboard and pebbledash.

If she moves in here

her hymen will grow back.

Can we go now?

Why does it always have to be about sex?

'Cuz everything is about sex.

Honestly,

I'm gonna put you on the Internet

and find a Neanderthal that'll blow out

the cobwebs in your...

Nah, I'm not movin' out...

until I've worked out what I'm doin'.

So just back off.

No... no, you said that 5 months ago.

Time's up!

Bye.

See ya.

'Ow do you know what you want in life?

Listen to your heart!

Your heart will tell you what to do.

I can't listen to my heart

it tells me things like...

You like "X-Factor" more

than you care to admit and...

Consider a perm.

I know what I want.

Oh, yeah?

Wot?

A girlfriend.

Well, you're not gonna find one down 'ere.

Come down 'ere and give me a 'and.

I will not come down

until my demands are met!

You'll be waitin' a long time then.

This old guitar...

taught me to sing

a love song.

Taught me how to laugh

and how

to cry.

It introduced me to some

friends of mine and it

brightened up some days.

And helped me make it through

some lonely nights.

A friend to have

on a cold

and lonely night.

Wot're ya doin?

I'm acceleratin' the cycle of life.

You can't just move them nearby.

They have strong homing instincts.

They'll come back.

I saw it on "Baywatch."

"Spring Watch," Mother.

Whateva.

Stop followin me.

No, he's goin' with ya.

What?!

That's my cowboy home!

Twenty-five.

Twenty-six.

Twenty-seven.

Twenty-eight.

I think I'm gonna be like

you when I'm older.

That's nice.

Why?

Ww it's

It's a nice compliment.

I meant, sad and angry all

the time after my Mum dies.

I'm not sad and angry all the time.

All right, no friends, then.

I've got friends!

All right, livin' with your Nan, then?

If you take your walkie-talkie home

we could talk to each other at night.

How many moles are there?

Twenty-nine.

Hey!

Hey.

How ya doin?

Good.

Nice bike!

Thank you.

How's it goin'?

Good yeah good. Great.

I'm just on my way to the supermarket.

Seven-thirty.

So life is good.

Very precise.

I don't like it when there

are children there.

Yeah.

Naturally, yeah.

Anna's just

gone to the bar to get us a drink,

d'ya wanna join us for a pint?

Uhh no, no you,

I didn't know you were with Anna.

I'll leave you to it.

- Why're you bein' weird?

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