A Fish Called Wanda Page #5

I've got tomorrow with some old hag.

Are you George Francis Thomason

of Kipling Mansions, London W9?

Yes, sir.

Charged with armed robbery.

Sit down.

Are we ready for a committal claim?

Yes, it will be under 6-2.

That is correct.

Here are the statements.

To be fully bound, please.

Stand up, Mr Thomason.

You are hereby committed to stand

trial at the central criminal court.

There is some urgency

about this case, madam.

The main witness, Mrs Eileen Cody,

has had heart difficulties recently.

Might this case be put down

for an early trial?

The listings officer will decide.

Take him to the cell.

Hi, hon. You look great! I love

your hair! Time for a coffee?

No. Have you considered it, though?

Why did he give you this? "Eileen

Cody, 69, Basil Street"? Is it to

send her flowers? Do her shopping?

Rub her out?

He wants you to rub her out?

He's going to kill her!

LAUGHS MANIACALLY

F*** off, or I'll kill YOU!

Limey fruits!

So the old lady's going to m-meet

with an accident, eh, K-Ken? Sssh!

What's so funny? Nothing. It's just

that wasting old ladies isn't nice!

It's better than...buggering people!

I bet you a pound

you don't kill her!

All right. All right.

I love watching your ass when you

walk. Is that beautiful or what?

Don't go near him! He's mine!

A pound says you won't kill her!

When could you look at it?

Thursday is hopeless.

My wife's going to the opera

Friday night. I'll look at it then.

Thanks, Archie.

Hi. I know we're not allowed

to talk. Give me a call. I can't!

Please.

I'm not allowed to speak.

You don't have to. I don't

want you for your conversation.

Look, I'd love to, but...

LOUD WAILS:

What happened? Got a date Friday.

JOLLY WHISTLING:

DOGS YAP:

Look here. Do you mind

not making that terrible noise?

My dogs will be having their nap.

Nice doggy...

DOGS BARK AND GROWL

Otto, what are you doing?

Buddhist meditation. It focuses

aggression. The monks did it before

battle. What kind of buddhism is it?

HORN BLARES:

A**hole!

It's an early Tantric meditation...

What is this? To get information I

might have to get friendly with him.

We're ready now at last.

Enjoy the opera, darling. Supper's

in the fridge, Archie. Be good.

What does "friendly" mean?

Cordial? Courteous?

Supportive? What?

I don't know.

Let's just see what happens.

So "friendly" might

include what? Penetration, say?

I don't need your jealousy now.

Jealousy? Yes! I'm just curious.

Me jealous of that fop?

What about my tits?

Does he get to handle them? Yes.

That's my forecast. Nuzzling?

is worth a little nuzzling.

Sucking? I thought you weren't

jealous! Jealousy is for the weak.

One thing, though -

touch his dick and he's dead!

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