A Fish Called Wanda Page #4

Let's just take, for example,

my friend George Thomason.

When he goes for his committal

on Wednesday... Thomason?

Yes. George Thomason?

Yes. Do you know him?

I'm defending him!

What are you talking about?

I'm his barrister. His lawyer.

That's so great!

That's so weird, though, isn't it?

I'm so happy

that you're defending him!

Thank you. He'll get off now!

Wow!

Well, I can watch you work now!

Please.

Amazing.

Anyway, at the committal,

George would then plead...

"Not Guilty". Really?

The evidence is circumstantial.

What about the identification?

An elderly lady.

I think they've got the wrong man.

You don't think he did it. No.

Let's just say for argument's sake

that you did think he did it.

If further evidence came to light,

for example. Right.

You'd advise him to plead guilty,

and turn over the jewels to cut his

sentence. He'd turn them over to?

To you?

Theoretically? Of course!

Well, um...

I'm so sorry,

I've forgotten your name.

Wanda.

Wanda. What a fool!

Well, Wanda, there are three...

Not Wanda Gershwitz?

Yes.

My God. What?

You're his alibi! I can't talk to

you! Why not? My dear young lady...

..you're a defence witness!

You must leave. Why? It's not

ethical for me to talk to a witness!

Everyone does it in America.

Please leave,

or I may have to give up the case.

Please?

Oh, Archie...

I didn't come here today to talk

about boring criminal procedures.

Come on! You know!

You knew the minute

I walked in here!

I want you.

What?

BUZZER:

Hello? 'Sir John is here.'

Show him in. Make love with me.

'Pardon?' Nothing!

Take me to bed, Archie. No, sorry.

Bye, Uncle!

Hi!

DRAMATIC CLASSICAL MUSIC

He's pleading "Not Guilty",

so you're safe until the trial.

Leach doesn't think he did it.

Ken says there's

a safe deposit box key,

but only George knows where it is.

"Thank you, Wanda(!)"

What have YOU found out?

Not a lot. You realise he's

in court tomorrow? I know that!

So nothing, huh? Nichts!

Zip...

Diddly... Bubkas...

Niente!

It's too big! No, it isn't, Portia.

It's enormous! No, it isn't!

Please, Mother. Absolutely not!

I'm so miserable and you just

don't care! Do shut up, Portia!

People complain to me all day!

Oh, dear.

DRAMATIC MUSIC:

TRUMPET FANFARE:

Ecco l'uomo!

Le due cupole grande

della cattedrale di Milano!

Benito Mussolini!

Dov'e il Vaticano?

Oh... Ecco l'uomo!

# Volare, oh, oh!

# E cantare, oh, oh... #

Archie, I want you to speak to her

about plastic surgery. Hmm?

I wish you'd listen. I want you to

speak to Portia. I'll speak to her

in the morning. Good night, Archie.

Good night, Archie!

Good night, Wanda!

Good night who?

Sorry, darling. Just a stupid case

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