17 Again Page #3

Ned!

You helped me cheat on my math test,

but I got caught.

Public record!

You asked Princess Leia to junior prom.

Covered by the local news.

I can't breathe!

I can't breathe!

Please.

- Oh!

- Ha, ha!

Oh, my God.

No, no, no.

Ned, Ned.

Oh, my God.

Would you stop staring at me?

- It's freaking me out.

- It's freaking me out!

I'm pubescent!

Okay. So, uh...

...it's a classic transformation story.

It appears in the literature

time and time again.

Were you at any point shot

by a gamma ray?

- No.

- Exposed to gamma radiation of any kind?

- No, Ned.

- No?

You wouldn't see it. Okay.

That eliminates these and those

and most of that side.

Are you now or have you ever been...

...a Norse god, vampire,

or time-traveling cyborg?

I've known you since, what, first grade?

I would have told you.

Vampire wouldn't tell.

Cyborg wouldn't know.

Shut up.

Okay, if it's not any of those,

I guess, um, we're looking at your basic...

...spirit guide transformation magic.

That's kind of a biggie, actually.

That is here.

When the hero...

- I guess that's... I guess, you.

- Hm.

Uh, is transformed by his spirit guide...

...to set him on a new path.

- Which is what?

- Do I look like your spirit guide?

The janitor.

The janitor.

You guys seen the janitor?

You seen the janitor?

- Do you know where the janitor is?

No.

Hey, where's the janitor?

Where does the janitor work?

- Excuse me!

- You all right, kid?

- There's another janitor who works here.

- Just me.

No, no. There's an older guy

with white hair who works here.

I was here yesterday talking to the janit...

I showed him this picture of me.

You?

- Yeah.

That picture's from 1989.

Right. Forget it.

Alex!

Alex, buddy!

Alex!

Hello?

Spirit guide?

What am I supposed to do?

Don't know what I'm supposed to do.

Ouch. Oh, ow.

I got shot. Did I get shot or did I get...?

Someone got powned.

- It's a grenade.

Ned.

Aah! Oh, sorry. Teenage you.

I figured it out.

I figured out what I'm supposed to do.

I figured out what my spirit guide

wants me to do.

I'm going back.

I'm going back to high school, Ned!

No! No, no. No way.

Your spirit guide would not waste

transformation magic...

...on you reliving your senior year

and going to prom. No.

Ned, this is my chance to have my life over,

but to do it right.

- Wouldn't you, if you had the chance?

- No.

I'm rich, and nobody stuck

my head in a toilet today.

Sure. Besides, it's not just about me.

- It's about you.

- No, it's much bigger than me.

- It's about you.

- Okay, maybe it's about me...

...but what's wrong with that?

I have not done anything

for me since 1989.

You do what you have to do. But don't

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