Zootopia Page #7

CGI JENNY UNGUSLATE

That’s right, it was I, the new mayor, the only person to actually have benefited from all these goings-on, who’d’ve guessed!

She shoots JASON with an INSANITY PELLET and he goes to TEAR OUT BUNNIFER’S THROAT.

CGI JENNY UNGUSLATE

Mwa ha ha, and now to simply leave and let this grisly scene be discovered in the morning whilst keeping my name completely out of it. OR:

(calls cops)

Help, police! I, the mayor, happened to be taking a midnight stroll through the natural history museum with a few thuggish minions, when by total chance I stumbled across Jason murdering Bunnifer! Please get every single officer in the precinct to this location within the next three minutes!

(hangs up)

And now, whilst I should probably do something about the highly incriminating weapon that's currently in my hand before the cops get here, I will instead take this opportunity to declare aloud that I was entirely behind all these predators going crazy, that it was a deliberate crime that I planned and executed, signed Mayor Jenny Unguslate.

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

GOTCHA! We were faking the whole attack and recorded your confession. We swapped out your crazy juice pellets for harmless blueberries!

CGI JENNY UNGUSLATE

Wait, seriously? You’re saying that you just happened to be carrying on you a liquid-filled sphere the exact color and dimensions of my psycho-balls?

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

Indeed we were! CONVENIENT COINCIDENCES FOR THE WIN!

JENNY is ARRESTED and ZOOTOPIA, having lost TWO CRIMINAL MAYORS in RAPID SUCCESSION and unearthed a RACIST PLOT to cause RACISM, naturally goes right back to being COMPLETELY STABLE.

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

And now Jason’s become my cop partner, so our hamfistedly metaphorical relationship is healed and we’re closer than ever, yay!

(pause)

Although in defiance of how almost any other version of this story would go, it’s still purely platonic. Because in a somewhat injudicious move, Disney’s put out a movie about racial tolerance where “interracial” couples are absolutely off the table.

CGI JASON BATEFOX

I can guarantee that won’t stop the furry community.

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

...Oh dear GOD. They’re going to write ALL THE PORN, aren’t they? Just ALL OF IT. EWWWWWWW .

END.

Rate this script:2.8 / 17 votes