Zoolander 2 Page #2
When I met you guys
two years ago,
it was the best orgy
of my life.
Let's get back to
that feeling.
It's there.
Hansel.
Every relationship
has to evolve.
And somehow, you've managed
to stay the same.
But you're gonna
have to change, my man.
'Cause change,
she is a-comin'.
What?
Natalka.
All of you?
How is this even possible?
We thought you'd be happy.
Well, I am happy.
That, uh...
It's just a lot to process,
and that's what I'm doing.
To be honest,
I've never seen myself
in this role, you know,
as a...
You mean a father?
Well... uh... I...
Let me...
I want to check on...
On the camel here!
Who am I?
Who am I?
Hey, hansel!
Billy Zane?
Got your netflix.
And this.
- Thanks very much.
- No, it's my bag.
Excuse me,
i think that's...
No, trust me,
this is my bag.
Just look at
Hansel.
Never heard of him,
honcho.
Look right here
at the ticket
and you can see that...
Derek zoolander.
Hi. It's been a long time.
Yeah. Not long enough.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
Wait a minute!
We haven't seen
each other since...
Since the building
you designed
fell on my face
and ruined my career?
Yeah, it's been a while.
It was an accident.
I didn't mean to...
You didn't mean to build
the support beams
out of popsicle sticks
and highly-flammable
rubber cement?
That was just
a little accident?
Yeah.
This is it. Forever.
Because I promise you,
this is the last time
we will ever see each other.
Right here, this moment.
Good-bye forever.
Works for me.
Hope you're not
an epiplectic,
because we're about
to get blinded.
Yep. Here we go.
Susan boyle, right here!
Take a picture of that!
Vultures!
I guess with my beard
and your disgusting face,
they don't know
who we are.
Derek! Hansel!
Hey, boys. I'm vip.
Vip?
Yeah.
I'm in charge
of social media
for don atari.
I've been working for him
since I was 10.
How old are you now?
Eleven.
Should we go to the hotel?
Pretty strange, you and i
to the big stage
like this.
A gig's a gig.
I'm just doing this
to get my son back.
Explain how doing
a fashion show's
gonna accomplish that.
I'm working again,
kkk, a responsible parent,
and they give me
my son back.
Responsible parent?
What? You don't think
i could be one?
No, it just brings up
some junk from the past.
I didn't have a father.
It's kind of my
You didn't
have a father?
Nah.
All my mom ever told me
was my dad was a beat cop.
Always on the road.
The road away
from little hansel.
Valentina. You're going
to want to see this.
Check out
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"Zoolander 2" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/zoolander_2_24045>.
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