What We Do in the Shadows Page #3

Synopsis: Follow the lives of Viago (Taika Waititi), Deacon (Jonathan Brugh), and Vladislav (Jemaine Clement) - three flatmates who are just trying to get by and overcome life's obstacles-like being immortal vampires who must feast on human blood. Hundreds of years old, the vampires are finding that beyond sunlight catastrophes, hitting the main artery, and not being able to get a sense of their wardrobe without a reflection-modern society has them struggling with the mundane like paying rent, keeping up with the chore wheel, trying to get into nightclubs, and overcoming flatmate conflicts.
Genre: Comedy, Horror
Production: Paladin Pictures
  25 wins & 18 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.6
Metacritic:
76
Rotten Tomatoes:
96%
R
Year:
2014
86 min
Website
14,069 Views


The Big Kumara is vampire owned and operated,

so we could always get in.

It's the hottest night spot

for vampires in Wellington.

- Come on in, guys, come on in.

- Thank you.

Perhaps you could bring

some people to the house.

- Sure.

- Perhaps some virgins?

Virgins? Yep, okay.

Any kind of preference in terms of gender or?

Maybe some ladies?

Yep. Ladies.

Perhaps a guy?

One of each?

One of each should be cool.

My relationship with Deacon is...

... well, I'm his familiar.

He's my Master.

He tells me what to do, I do it.

We have the kind of master-servant

relationship which works nicely.

Actually.

- Hello!

- Hello.

Oh, it's a little bit of blood.

Um, my husband, he's a,

he's a hemophiliac.

You know, someone who bleeds a lot.

Yeah.

Any kind of age range?

- Young.

- But not, not kids?

Not kids.

18 to 30?

Definitely younger than yourself.

Okay, so 18 to 30.

So it's a dinner party?

- I'll be there?

- Yes!

- Dinner party.

- The guys we'll be there?

Yes.

- We will all be there?

- Yes, we will dress up.

- Okay, great.

- And then... eat them.

- Should be fun.

- Okay, great.

I was just wondering

if we could talk about the...

You don't know of a night dentist?

Because I have this thing here.

I was just wondering if

we could talk about the deal.

- Hm?

- The deal.

- The dishes?

- No, the...

The deal is that he is going

to give me eternal life.

Um, which is...

... very exciting.

Well, I just feel like I kind of

reached my potential and

I wouldn't want to kind of,

get any older before, I kind of...

I just feel like I'm the best version

of myself that I can be.

It's just that it's been

4 and a half years and I just

I just want... doing your plans and...

Doing your dry-cleaning.

Now I'm doing your dishes.

Yeah... the dentist?

And the dentist and it's just taking

an awful long time, so I was just wondering...

- Be gone!

- Okay.

- I see you later!

- Okay.

One of the most unfortunate things

about being a vampire is that...

... you have to drink human blood.

I like to make a real evening of it.

Play some music.

Maybe give them some nice wine.

It's their last moment alive so

why not make it a nice experience.

So...

Tell we what you do, what do you...

I was thinking about

going back to Uni, actually.

Oh, you are?

Lets put this over

there.

University, yeah?

Yeah, but after that,

I'm gonna travel.

Yeah...

I really wanted

to go over seas for ages, so..

Saving out and I'm gonna go to Spain and

Italy and London and...

Yeah.

Okay. Excuse me.

Just put that there.

There we go.

Sh*t!

Well, that didn't go so great.

Um, I hit the main artery.

So, yeah, it's a real mess in there, um...

Rate this script:5.0 / 3 votes

Jemaine Clement

Jemaine Clement (born 10 January 1974) is a New Zealand singer, comedian, musician, actor, voice actor, director, and writer. With Bret McKenzie, as the comedy duo Flight of the Conchords, he has released several albums and created comedy series for both BBC and HBO. He has had featured parts in films such as Gentlemen Broncos (2009), Rio (2011), Men in Black 3 (2012) and Moana (2016). In 2014, he made his feature film directorial debut with the horror comedy mockumentary What We Do in the Shadows, which he wrote, starred in and directed with Taika Waititi. He currently portrays Oliver Bird on the FX series Legion (2017–). more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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