
Two of a Kind
- PG
- Year:
- 1983
- 88 min
- 144 Views
(0.00 / 0 votes)Neverstand behind a golfer, dummy,
when he's gettin'ready, to take a shot.
Stand over there.
Damn!
- Want some chicken?.
- I quit eatin' meat. It slows me down.
Let's go, boys. The boss is on his way.
I'm glad he's comin' back,
but there goes my golf game--
weekends too.
Should be around here somewhere.
Hey, Gonzales, you see
where my ball went?.
I'm notyour caddy. I'm a garbage man.
Yeah, butyou got eyes.
You can see that garbage.
You oughta be able to
- Charlie! Charlie! You see my ball?.
- Yeah, I saw it.
- Where is it?.
- God only knows.
You know, Charlie, you
oughta ask them fora change.
You've been a bum down there
for almost a millennium.
Look, you worry about what you do,
and I 'll worry about what I do.
Do you know what it's like to hear
you guys argue through eternity?.
Well, put some chicken in your ears.
Charlie, give me my ball. I
knowyou took it! Gimme my ball.
Stop arguing, boys. Give him his ball.
Did he saywhat he's been doing?.
Where's he been since 1960?.
- I mean, may,be he forgot he's God.
- Listen...
he's been working 24 hours a day,,
six day,s a week since the dawn oftime.
Don't you think he deserves
some kind of rest and change?.
Yeah, but he
hadn't even--
H:
- How was your vacation?.
- Bless yourself.
- Thanky,ou.
Can't I turn my back for a minute?.
When the cat's away,
the mice will play, huh?.
I leavey,ou fourin charge
fora mere 25y,ears--
a drop in the bucket
oftime, by,the way,--
I come back, and the
world is a total mess.
We're understaffed.
Oh, y,ou're gonna pass the
buck, huh? That's y,our answer?
No, I - I think I have to do
something drastic. I wanna start over.
- You mean, real ly... start over?.
- Right. Right.
You remember the Bible, Adam and Eve.
May,be I'll start with a woman this time.
H m m. A flood worked
before. Yeah. I like it.
- But you said you'd never do that again!
- That's right.
- Didn't he promise?. -
Yes! - You did. You did.
Hey! I'm God. I changed my mind.
But there's still a lot of
goodness left in the world.
- She's right. There is.
- Yeah!
Yeah!
Yousay,there's goodness
left in the world, huh?
Okay,. Show me one goodperson.
What about him?.
- Great choice, moron.
- There's a good person!
- Ruthie, give me a ty,pical man.
- There's one!
- Which one?
- Him!
That kid? Done!
- He looks nervous.
- Since when is nervous a crime?
Looks like my, cousin, Paco.
He 's doing time in Folsom.
All right. Hold it
down. I like this. Yeah.
How you doi n', Stuart?.
$ 13,464.
Stuart, I told ya I 'd
get it for ya. I promise.
I want it today at 6..00.
- All right.
- Hold him.
Or else, I'm gonna takeyour ears.
Ya understand?.
- Say "yes."
- Yes.
Now.
It worked.
Zack, no more excuses this time.
I want that money, and I want all
ofit, or I'm gonna takeyour ears...
and I'm gonna grind them and all those
stupid inventions ofyours into dust!
Ya hear me?. Pick up the phone,
Zack. I knowyou're listening.
Don't stand so closely.
Get back in the car.
Zack! 6..00 or it's all over. 6..00.
Aaah!
Lucky.
Howya doin'?.
You know, I came toyou becauseyou are
by far the foxiest chick in the bank.
Broadway Savings. Good
morning. Can I helpyou?.
This is Susan Elliott.
- Uh, your check!
- Oh, thanks.
Morning. I, uh, came to you...
'cause I thinkyou're the
prettiest chick in the bank.
I'm sorry. I'm closed.
Twenty,, 40, 60, 80, 100.
Howya doin'?.
You know, I, uh, came to you
because I think you're by,far the
foxiest chick in the bank.
Can I help you?.
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"Two of a Kind" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 14 Apr. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/two_of_a_kind_22422>.