The Ugly Dachshund Page #4

about that cover

I'm doing for his magazine.

Oh, is this it?

Uh, well, that's one

of my ideas, yeah.

Why, those are

the dachsies, huh?

- Uh-huh.

- Well, that's sweet.

But, uh,

what is that big thing

they're staring at

so adoringly?

Well, that... that's a, uh...

I haven't decided yet,

actually.

It's... it's a larger

animal of some kind,

you know, for contrast.

Oh, yeah, that's...

that's a good idea.

You know, a... a Great Dane

might be effective.

- You really think so?

- Mm-hmm...

but you should be using Danke

and the puppies for models.

[Chuckling] They're a little

too small for that yet, dear.

[Chuckling]

Well, you haven't noticed

how fast they're growing.

Come on, girls.

[Barking]

Well, how about that?

They're out of the basket.

[Whining]

And Brutus...

Well, will you look

at him, huh?

Hey, look at the way he's...

...he's growing.

- [Fran chuckles]

- Kind of like a weed, huh?

Or like a Great Dane.

Now, just hang on a minute...

Just hold on there, now,

for a minute, Fran.

I can explain everything.

Like you've been explaining

for the last couple of weeks?

"There's nothing wrong.

He's not different.

It's just that

he was born later."

- I didn't say that. You did.

- Well, what do you say now?

You still gonna tell me

that's a dachshund?

I didn't say that, Fran.

Not once did I say

that was a dachshund.

No, no.

You were sneaky about it.

You took advantage of me, Mark.

I never thought you could be

that deceitful and sneaky.

Oh, now, come on.

You could have

come out like a man

and told me you were gonna

bring that dog home

instead of hiding it,

smuggling it in

with the puppies, Mark.

Sneaky, sneaky, sneaky!

Okay, okay!

I'm sneaky, but...

Mark, I really never thought

that you could do something...

that... sneaky!

Well, If you'll give me

just a minute, I'll tell you.

- I don't believe you.

- You haven't heard me yet!

Well, I'm never gonna

believe you again.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- Well, for goodness sakes.

I'll fix it.

- Fran... Fran, if I hadn't...

- [Brutus yipping]

- Come here, little fella.

- [Whines]

If I hadn't brought

this poor little puppy home,

he would have starved.

- Starved?

- That's right.

Came from a big litter,

couldn't get enough to eat,

and... and, Fran,

his own mother pushed him away.

- No!

- That's right.

Oh, poor Brutus.

Oh...

When Danke had her pups, well,

she had too much milk, so, uh,

Dr. Pruitt asked

if she couldn't wet-nurse him

till he was weaned, that's all.

I tell you, I... I just didn't

have the heart to refuse,

I really didn't, and I'm sure

you wouldn't have, either.

Oh, of course not.

Oh, poor Brutus,

I'm sorry for all

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