The Stuff Page #2

It's... spoiled.

It doesn't taste spoiled to me.

You taste it and tell me

if you think it's spoiled.

I don't want any.

Look, it moves around all by itself.

It moves!

I saw it move in the refrigerator.

Hey, freak!

What are you on, anyway?

- Jason! You come back here!

- I hope these stains come out.

- What's the matter with that boy?

- Look at that. Not a spot.

Low in calories, good tasting

and it doesn't even spot.

And he doesn't like it.

- There's nothing like it around.

- Coupled with benign bacteria?

It was probably just a lucky accident

that tasted great.

They seem to reproduce this accident

in great quantities.

Well, that's what I don't understand.

I thought some government regulation

requires them to reveal the contents.

They're protected by the FDA's

Statute of Identity's rule.

The same law protects Coca-Colas

secret formula for their syrup.

MOE:
Gentlemen,

the little lady entering the room

is doing some

undercover research for me.

Because, folks, if we're going to

find out the secret formula of Stuff,

we're going to have to steal it.

( music plays )

WOMAN:
A little faster paced. Okay?

Let's get movement into this. Step, step!

Let's see the bathing suits.

Okay, I want wonderful smiles.

- You got that, is it good?

- MAN:
Yes.

Now I want you to feed each other

The Stuff with nice smiles on your face.

My lips crave more and more

each day

One lick is never enough

of The Stuff...

Pearl and Cathy, get a slightly

tighter shot of them, will you?

- MAN:
You want me to move in?

- As they come forward, move in.

Can you get it?

Go in for a close-up of the faces of

these two 'cause they're real beauties.

Let me see how much you love it!

Very good. Thanks, girls.

Okay, Christine, by yourself.

Right to the lens. Right here.

I'm going to want you to go in

for a tight close-up

- as she feeds the camera.

- ( whispers )

What are you doing?

Are you out of your mind?

- Who the hell are you?

- Everybody break for five minutes.

I got to talk to Miss Kendall about

her employment and this job.

You all can break. Coffee?

You can take off with that.

Kill the lights and the sound.

You got that?

- ( music stops )

- What...?

I'm sorry to interrupt you,

but I can't wait in line.

I can tell you're not the type

of person to wait in line either.

You didn't get where you are now

by waiting in line, did you?

- How do you know that story?

- That's the way I got where I am.

And here I am with you

and you're awful pretty.

- "David...Rutherford?"

- Moe! My friends call me Moe.

They call me Moe 'cause every time they

give me something, I always want mo'!

And I suppose you're wondering

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