The Horizontal Lieutenant Page #2

girl I thought about was?

Was it farlene sausten?

No.

Was it that redhead

Mildred something?

No.

Was it Candy Cane Lutz, the drum

majorette with the big baton.

No. It was Molly Blue.

Now, that must mean something.

It means you got

a hit on the head.

It means you were in my mind.

I'd been thinking about you.

Now, that must mean something.

Doesn't it?

I don't know. Maybe.

And you did used to like me...

[Laughing] A

little bit, anyway.

I suppose so...

in weak moments.

So date me.

I can't.

Why not?

Well, I'm on duty tonight.

You wouldn't lie

to me, would you?

Why should I lie?

Hiya, Blue.

Oh, hello, doctor.

I'll pick you up around 8:00.

Look your prettiest, kitten.

We're throwing a real

winger tonight.

Ok.

I'm sorry.

[Crunch]

Merle, for heaven's sakes.

Come on, spit it out.

Merle, spit it out! Come on!

Uh-uh. All right.

Now, come on. Oh!

Merle! Come on. Come on.

[Chuckling]

Heh heh heh!

[Asian accent]

Hiya, lieutenant.

What's the good word?

Any calls while I was out?

Calls? Let's see...

Nope. No calls.

Lieutenant Blue

didn't call, huh?

Nope. He didn't call either.

It's a girl, Tada, a nurse.

Nope.

Nothing happened all day long.

Well, that's par

for the course in this outfit.

Everybody else

is out shooting the enemy.

I get hit in the face

with baseballs.

Lieutenant, how you happen to get

into intelligence department?

Just how do you

mean that, Tada?

I don't mean something.

It's very simple.

I studied languages

in college,

and naturally,

they assigned me

to Japanese interpretation.

Why not?

Why not?

Yeah, except I studied French.

Oh, sure.

Sometimes I wonder

how the high command

makes decisions in this army.

Maybe they use a ouija board.

You know, if it weren't

for you niseis,

I'd still think that sukiyaki

was an enemy general.

What's the matter?

When you say high command,

it ring a gong in my head.

There was a call for you.

Lieutenant Blue?

No, no, no, not

Lieutenant Blue.

Colonel Delgan...

high command.

Colonel Delgan,

and you forgot?!

What's the matter

with you, Tada?!

What time did he call?!

I think it was yesterday.

Yesterday.

You sent for me, sir?

Did I?

Who are you?

Lieutenant Wye, sir.

Oh. How come we don't see you

out with the ball

team, lieutenant?

We want that pennant,

you know.

As coach, I like to see

every man doing his part.

If you will recall, sir, I was hit

in the head with a foul ball.

Oh, that Lieutenant Wye.

Yeah, I place you now.

You hit .150 and can't

judge a high fly.

I'm afraid that's right, sir.

Aw, never mind. We're not

here to talk about baseball.

Lieutenant, uh, I think

we have a field assignment

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